


Avatar: In Stereo

by KittyBender



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: 70's Music, 80's Music, Alternate Universe - Avatar & Benders Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Music, Angst, Azula (Avatar) Redemption, Ba Sing Se, Drama, F/F, F/M, Family Issues, Fluff and Smut, Lemon, Lesbian Azula (Avatar), Nostalgia, Past Abuse, Romance, Therapy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:28:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 37,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24888358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyBender/pseuds/KittyBender
Summary: What if the Gaang had met in an 80's epoque universe? What if colourful makeup was the latest trend in the University of Ba Sing Se? Maybe the once secluded city is living the effects of a new sexual freedom... Submerge in a retro revival through this music-guided story of love, university Gaang and... gangs. Bending is included here, though not as hardcore. Includes music, some fights and smut.
Relationships: Aang/Katara (Avatar), Azula & The Gaang (Avatar), Azula/Therapy, Mai/Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Toph Beifong/Satoru (Avatar)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	1. The Waterbending Scroll

**Author's Note:**

> So, hold tight, and enjoy the ride to my first fanfic! Though I'm a writer, it's been a brand new challenge. The Youtube list to this baby is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdQY7BusJNU&list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv and it'll be updated with each chapter.

Katara had never been a fan of farewells: the breathtaking loneliness of separation was intense, more intense now, given the fact she had never left home before. As she finished unpacking the baggage that was spilled over her student's dorm bed, she thought about the things she had left behind: her father, her grandmother, her town and people. The warm coziness of her house, surrounded by the cold, humble majesty of the snow; the traditional hut of Gran-Gran on the outskirts, with its faint smell of sea prunes and seaweed lotion. Feeling emotional, she embraced the latest image of her father, as he peered from his car next to the dock, waving his hand as if he couldn't say the last goodbye.

Next to him, her brother Sokka had waved his hand, yelling: "See you later, sis! Don't get in trouble while I arrive!"

  
She had preferred traveling by sea, since it made her feel more at easy- she was surrounded by her element, and the sailors knew her and respected her. Her brother, anyway, had preferred to travel by plane - a wise choice, he thought, as he laughed at the impracticality of his sister's water attachments. Now, he had the house and his father for himself for a few days.  
Katara picked up her waterbending scroll from the end of the case and paused for a minute. She didn't need it anymore, she was far ahead from this knowledge - but it was a token of her culture, a culture subdued by modernity and benders and non-benders issues. She intended to let it be copied here, at the University of Ba Sing Se, for all the Southern Water Tribe benders to see it. Besides, it had been a gift from her father when she was fourteen, and...

Her father. Her mother... the fire that had consumed her. Since the hut they lived in had burnt with her mother inside it, they had lived in an modern house. Sometimes, her father would tell to Gran Gran, a dim look over his face, that huts were dangerous fire traps and that he could help her get a new house. But the elder lady always refused. She was so willed and strong - just as Katara was.

Since then, Katara had been the only woman in the family, and without knowing it she had taken the mother role.  
Maybe that was the reason why leaving her father had been so hard. In such conditions, a girl may not understand her father as a fully realized adult.

_Lying in my bed,_ _I hear the clock tick and think of you_  
 _Caught up in circles, c_ _onfusion is nothing new_  
 _Flashback, warm nights almost left behind_  
 _Suitcase of memories t_ _ime after_

  
"If you need me, I'm one call away. I can come back". Her voice was determined.

The odd look of Hakoda's eyes still haunted her as he answered: "I'll miss you, but you have to pursue your dreams, Katara, that's the only thing that matters. I'll always be there if you need me, too. You and your brother are the most important to me".

_Sometimes you picture me,_ _I'm walking too far ahead_  
 _You're calling to me, I can't hear w_ _hat you've said_  
 _Then you say, "go slow" a_ _nd I fall behind_  
 _The second hand unwinds..._

She couldn't say a word as she hugged him, tears dwelling her eyes.

_If you're lost you can look and you will find me_   
_Time after time_   
_If you fall, I will catch you, I'll be waiting_   
_Time after time_

"I love you, dad".

"Me too, daughter".

Now, sitting on a lonely dorm at the School of Nurses of Ba Sing Se, she sighed and gathered the enormous courage she possessed in order to break the melancholy, and displayed her best efforts to make her room look presentable. Over the bed, she laid the blue quilt trimmed with white fur. It had an enormous V shaped design cutting it in half, made with a patch of Earth Kingdom cotton. The quilt was handmade by the women of the tribe, and she loved it. Over the naked wall, she put a poster of Bonnie Tyler; over her desk, she did the same with the Water Tribe scroll, carefully displaying it on its wooden frame. A photo of her family, an ornamented miniature kayak and her favorite pillow over the chair finished the furnishing of her new home. A few buildings away, at the School of Engineers' dorms, her brother must have been doing the same.

"Now we are all here, in a way" she murmured, clutching to her mother's necklace. "The family is united again".

Walking down the hallway, her hand still over the necklace's pendant, she diriged to the public telephone to call her father.

_After my picture fades and darkness has turned to gray_   
_Watching through windows, you're wondering if I'm okay_   
_Secrets stolen from deep inside_   
_And the drum beats out of time..._

The phone rang a while before her father's voice broke the uneasy sound, filling her heart with peace and a deep sense of belonging, making her smile for the first time in the day. Far away, the snow fell gingerly over the South Pole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in this chapter:
> 
> Cyndi Lauper - Time After Time
> 
> I think I'll be updating every 2 days. But it may be sooner!


	2. Dirty Dancing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.  
> So, I was thinking about how can mix the AtLA universe with "our" music; I want the music to be a focus, indeed, but I don't want its existence to be a distraction from the plot. So, I'll let it be some sort of soft-magic explanation: while the universe is mostly from Avatar, the music and the "era" they're submerged in, is a retro one. Sometimes I'll even slide some songs older than 70's - 80's.  
> To make this clear: let's imagine somewhere in this AtLA universe, in a hypothetical place, our iconic artists are setting trends: the feelings they evoke in this fanfic are as real as they were for people 40 years ago. And, thoug no one will be meeting Madonna, Katara will DEFINITELY have a Bonnie Tyler poster and a little country style. Ain't she cute? Let me know in the comments, please!

As Sokka finished to tidy up his own room, he heard a knock on the door. He opened it without removing the wolf helmet he was wearing, just to find his fellow from the adjacent room. He was on a wheelchair and had a tentative grin on his face.

"Hey, buddy. I'm Teo, and I'm spinning around the dorms to tell everyone that there's a party tonight for the new ones at The Sizzling Dragon. It's one of the favorite clubs of the students, I've been told".

Sokka shaked the boy's left hand and smiled, wondering how on earth the lad would go to classes over such artifact. He decided to relieve the feel through a joke.

"Well, you're so-very-much spinning around, Teo! You'll be the envy of the classroom with that car".

The boy laughed.

"Wanna see? I can go as fine as a car".

Sokka raised his eyebrows.

"Do you mean you reach 60 miles per hour?"

The gentle smile of the boy turned into a mischievous grin.

"Meet me by the central fountain at 19:30 and I'll show you", he said.

Sokka fixed him with an amused, determined look.

A few hours after, Katara concluded combing her hair, and looking at her reflection in the mirror, she wondered if her hair loops were adequate for the imposing, surrealist late trend. Hesitant at first, she decided to loop them anyway, pinning them over an assymetrical bun at the top of her head and letting the rest fall loose and messy over her shoulders. And as for clothes, she decided to go simple: over her dark blue leggings, she wore a long denim shirt with an elastic belt.

It was when she was arriving to The Sizzling Dragon that she saw it: an incoming ball of oil green and dark blue, coming at the highest speed from up the hill, barely touching the ground, yelling with a familiar voice...

"OPEN UP, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! TEO'S MOBILE GOING DOWN THE ROAD!"

Oh Ocean spirits. "Sokka!" she yelled, as the ball sped up in front of her, braking vertiginously at the end of the street. As she rushed down the pavement, she started to pant nervously in front of her brother:

"I leave you alone for five days to find you driving - when you can't EVEN drive - riding a MOTORBI-?! Wait, is that a wheelchair?!

Teo removed his motocross goggles before offering his hand to Katara.

"Hi, I'm Teo. You must be Sokka's sister, Katara, isn't it? Your brother told me a lot about you. This is my flying wheelchair".

Katara couldn't say a word as they entered the club, so Teo continued talking.

"My father is an inventor, and he modified my wheelchair to turn it into an amazing device of multiple purposes. You can come to fly at the back of it anytime you like, Katara".

"No, thank you, Teo. I think I'd rather walk by the trees" she replied as kindly ash she could, her voice still a little bit strained.

The club was so amazing that Katara lost any restrainment she'd felt before just by the look of it. It was enormous: a big dance floor, with a last decade disco ball, surrounded by private booths lined in dark green faux leather. A bar counter at the back of the room offered its colourful lights and colourful drinks. The second floor was opened as a gallery, so the people up there could see what happened at the dance floor. Some of the boldest ones would even show their skills by dancing over the tables that were attached to the balconies, swaying dangerously by the empty space. While the group picked up the athmosphere, the speakers started to reproduce some House music - Jesse Saunders' On and On.

"We'll have some wheat beer at the bar with Teo. Have fun, sis!". And, before, Katara could say a word, her brother had disappeared in the crowd.

She scowled. Now who could she talk to? Looking around, she only recognized one face - a white haired girl, her face as pretty and gentle as a face could be. She had seen her by the hallway as she talked with her dad at the phone, and now, her mere presence was a gift. So she approached to the lonely girl and waved her hand.

"Hi! I think we are schoolmates. I'm Katara, and I'm at the Nursing School. What's your name?"

The girl smiled. Her voice was high and soothing.

"I'm Yue. I'm from the Northern water tribe and I came here to take a course on Caring and Healing of Birth and Early Childhood".

"Oh! Uhm... that sounds nice. I thought you would've come to study a full career, you know... because you come from so far"

"Oh, don't worry about that. Actually, a career could be too much for me... I'm a princess of my tribe, so my career is my people".

Katara felt short on answers, so she suggested to take a drink. Yue chose a "Bagdermole Rockstar", which was lychee juice with sake, sprinkled with small pieces of jennamite, while Katara chose a simple mango cocktail.

As Yue and Katara took a seat by the dance floor, the white-haired girl suppressed an amused smile while looking at someone at the dance floor.

"Why would someone move their arms like that? It looks like a windmill"

"Guess he wants to climb to the second floor without using the stairs" Katara laughed heartedly.

"Well, I think it's sorta cute" added Yue, in a low voice, before sipping her drink absentmindedly. Katara continued laughing at the strange boy, who was almost invisible at the dim lights.

"So he wants to bless the floor with his forehead, huh? He is - wait - oh, he is my brother".

Sokka was displaying his most flamboyant moves to the rythm of the house music, and Katara had to look away so he wouldn't recognize her. She felt slightly embarrased at his brother's moves, while she drank her mango cocktail tapping her foot on the ground and a new song started to pop.

"Oh, I love this song! It's one of my mother's favorites" said Yue, as she swayed her head at the rythm of the upbeat disco music of ABBA's Dancing Queen.

"Oh, really? I like it as well. It makes me feel like I was one year ago" joked Katara, flatly.

_Ooh, y_ _ou can dance, y_ _ou can jive_   
_Having the time of your life_   
_Ooh, see that girl, w_ _atch that scene_   
_Digging the dancing queen_

"Katara, look" whispered Yue suddenly, making her heart leap. "That boy in the table by the bar, he is watching you! Don't look at him! I'll describe him to you".

"I can only see his feet. He is wearing this weird red slippers and stretched parachute pants"

"Well, his clothes are a bit weird, I don't know if he is new wave or just post-punk. But I swear he is handsome. He has an orange loose shirt and his tattoos are, like, real badass, but not dangerous badass. He looks pretty genuine to me".

"Oh, c'mon, Yue, let's dance and I will see how he looks! Don't say no, I can see your feet". And, taking the white-haired girl by the hand, Katara went to dance - approaching purposely to the table by the bar.

As she turned and twisted with the music, she could catch a glimpse of the guy Yue was talking about. He was a tall, pretty boy, with a crooked grin and a bottle of beer on his hand. He was actually dancing by the dance floor; though his movements were subdued, they were gifted. Suddenly, she noticed something: he was bald.

"Yue! You didn't tell me he was bald!" she exclaimed, approaching her head to her friend's ear to make herself be heared above the music.

"Why? I didn't find it necessary. He doesn't look like a skinhead"

"Well, I like them with hair!"

_Friday night and the lights are low_   
_Looking out for a place to go_   
_Where they play the right music_   
_Getting in the swing_   
_You come to look for a king_   
  


Suddenly, Katara realized the boy wasn't there anymore. She had turned to tell Yue 'well, it doesn't matter now, he is gone' when she made a gesture at Katara's back.

  
_Anybody could be that guy..._

The boy was before her, smiling charming but genuinely.

"May I have this dance?"

Katara looked at Yue quizzically.

"Why, go on! Have fun!"

Before Katara could notice, the handsome stranger had her hand in his. Giving her a gentle turn, he spoke loudly:

"Hi. I'm Aang, I'm an Air nomad. Who are you?"

"I'm Katara from the South pole. I came here to study Nursing, how about you?"

In order to talk, the couple had to lean on each other's ears. Katara was starting to feel uneasy at the closeness. Perhaps noticing it, Aang decided to let the conversation go - and give her the dance of her life. Half-twirling her slowly, he held her both hands in his, keeping his body at a respectful distance from the girl's back. He guided her movements from there, swinging her upper body from left to right.

How smooth, Katara thought. Maybe it wasn't of any importance that his head was shaved; anyway, he had a nice arrow tattoo keeping the dullness of his head at an ease. Yue hadn't notice that the boy was an airbender, not a skinhead - nor a punk. And girl, he could dance with feet as light as clouds, his shoulders shaking gently. Everything in him spoke of kindness.

_You are the dancing queen  
Young and sweet, only seventeen  
Dancing queen  
Feel the beat from the tambourine, oh yeah_

She felt magic as the song started to fade on her ears, giving way to lowbeat music: the cue to chat and buy drink, to explore the club and head to the bathroom.

Aang turned to face Katara, his smoothness gone, a hand stroking the back of his neck. "Well, that was nice!"

"Thank you, I really enjoyed that" she smiled.

As they sat together at the table, Yue waved them.

"Guess you really enjoyed yourselves, huh? I'm Yue."

"Hi Yue! I'm Aang".

"And I'm Sokka" proclaimed a voice next to them, as Katara's brother sat with a beer on his hand. "What's up?"

"Hi, brother" Katara accentuated the word, "this is Yue and he is Aang. This my brother Sokka".

"Well, I've already said that" added Sokka, sipping a bit of beer. Katara fixed him with a stern glance, still remembering how he'd left her alone. To her big surprise, Yue smiled at her brother's remark, so Katara decided to drop it. "Where is your friend?"

It could be the light, but when Sokka spoke, he was glancing at the white haired girl with shiny eyes. "He left early. He didn't even spend twenty minutes here! I guess wheelchairs are not easy to carry around here. But I enjoyed the ride. And he left me his beer".

"He is nice. I hope there are more people like him around the campus".

"Oh, I bet there are" declared Sokka, smiling at Yue, who blushed slightly. "Wanna dance, Yue?"

The girl took his hand gladly, and as the music transitioned to darker waves, Katara and Aang found themselves drinking their beverages awkwardly. But Aang was a friendly creature, so he broke the silence.

"I was wishing to debuff a little. I had a hard year training, you know, so this is the first time I'm not working my butt off or traveling. Do you train in something...? Are you a bender?"

"I'm a waterbender" answered Katara, looking at him curiously. She assumed the boy was an skilled airbender, due to his tattoos and the litheness of his movements. "And I'm looking forward to take a minor on waterbending healing".

"It's an amazing gift, being able to cure. I wish I knew. I try to learn the most I can from the places I go to".

"Where have you been?"

"Well, I've been to all nations. It's part of my culture to explore the whole world. I've been at the Southern Water Tribe, too".

"Really? I didn't see you. I'd remember an airbender among our visitors" said Katara, suspicious.

"Do you live in the capital?" Katara nodded. "Well, I wasn't there. I was at the smaller towns close to the tundra".

"Really? And what were you doing there?"

"I was exploring. I like those places that seem unscathered. Turns out, the Water tribe is anything but detached. Your ties are as strong as permafrost".

Katara smiled, feeling at home with the chat. "Yes, we are". Feeling daring, she took Aang's hand as the music changed again. "Let's dance!"

The rock music felt bold and mischievous. It was Laura Branigan - Self Control, and suddenly Katara felt as if the song was undressing her inhibitions. Or maybe it was the alcohol? Shaking her hair with one hand, she started to sway her torso smoothly.

_You take my self, you take my self control_   
_You got me living only for the night_   
_Before the morning comes, the story's told_   
_You take my self, you take my self control_

The light in Aang's eyes became dimer as he rocked his hips gracefully, watching her movements through a veil of red light. The alcohol had worked, and Katara felt an unresistible closeness as the airbender's gave her a half twirl, clinging his chest to her back. She could feel his breath on her jaw, next to her ear...

_You help me to forget to play my role_   
_You take my self, you take my self control_

Suddenly, the boy raised one of Katara's hands, placing a hand on her ribcage to tilt her body against his as he leaned back. The feeling of being guided on such a movement was amazing, and she smiled rapturedly.

_I, I live among the creatures of the night_   
_I haven't got the will to try and fight_   
_Against a new tomorrow, so I guess I'll just believe it_   
_That tomorrow never knows_

Next to them, a black-haired girl dressed in jade green danced, stomping her feet against the floor. And Aang remembered immediately.

"I'm sorry, Katara" he whispered as loud as he could, next to her ear. "I have to go now".

Katara's smile vanished.

"Why? I thought we were having a good time"

"Yeah, it was great. But I forgot something important - and I have to leave and take care of it before the morning". He started to walk towards the door.

"But... Aang! Can I have your phone number?" The girl stopped next to him by the door.

"I thought there were no phones at the university" the airbender answered, genuinely confused.

_A safe night, I'm living in the forest of a dream_   
_I know the night is not as it would seem_   
_I must believe in something, so I'll make myself believe it_   
_That this night will never go_

"But don't worry" he continued. "I know I'll see you soon... and you can tell me what does a Water tribe capital girl to have fun in the city".

Before Katara knew it, the boy had disappeared through the doors of The Sizzling Dragon.

Going back into the club, she saw Yue and Sokka, dancing intensely over the dance floor. But she couldn't seize the mood.

"Oh, well done, Katara" she thought, stirring her mango cocktail with a straw. "Falling for the first guy who dances with you at the university". A voice at the back of her head added: "But what a dancer!"

The music started to fade, as she immersed deeply at the thought: she had almost kissed a guy on the first night.

_You take my self, you take my self control_

_You take my self, you take my self control_

Running through the street, as he quickly bended an air-scooter to help himself go faster, Aang had to do an effort to remove the luminous blue eyes of Katara from his mind. How could he forget?

He had to remember about the girl who was waiting for him at his dorm's room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs on this chapter: (remember they're on the playlist, too!):
> 
> Jesse Saunders - On and On  
> ABBA - Dancing Queen  
> Laura Branigan - Self Control


	3. The Blind Runaway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to put a Chilean song in here (80's indeed) translated, of course, so the meaning of it can intertwine with this chapter. Anyway, the lyrics are not 100% percent accurate because I removed a few lines that didn't fit well.

_One month ago, Gaoling town_

The Blind Bandit held the biggest prize high in the air. The winner's belt of The Earth Rumble XI! Oh, and a few hundred pieces of gold. She was the best.

"Now you're mine again, you tricky trinket" she thought. "You escaped last year just because of that dumb party my dad was hosting, but I swear I'm not gonna lose you anymore!"

As she went down from the arena by bending a rock platform, the host Xin Fu approached to her. "There is a man who wants to see The Blind Bandit"

"Must be a fan. Tell him I'm busy" interrupted Toph.

"No it ain't. Says he's your father".

Toph stopped abruptly, and jumped off the platform. As a whole opened by the wall, she felt her father's steps approaching to her. She wanted to speak, but there were no words coming at her mouth. She clenched her jaw, and her father wasted no time:

"So my source was right all the time. Your mother and I wouldn't believe it until we saw your empty bed"

"Dad..."

"We'll pick this up when we arrive home. Open this up to the street"

Xin Fu was way too shocked to ask questions, and he bended a tunnel at the opposite wall for Toph and Lao to leave. The girl walked behind her father, and when they arrived to the surface by the street, she felt her mother leaning over the cab of the brand new Mercedes Benz her father had bought. As they approached to Poppy, she called out in disbelief, her hand on her throat:

"Toph..."

They sat on the car, and Lao turned on the engine. Though she couldn't see them well with the vibration on the car's floor, Toph could hear her father's breathing, rough and stiff, and her mother's tearful sighs. There was no way she could outsmart this as she had outsmarted her opponents at the arena. The fighting... Did she have to say goodbye to her only joy?

_How to start? They're your parents and your friends_

_They want to be in your life forever and ever_

_Don't you allow their white hairs_

_To wrinkle you this early_

As they entered the house, her father guided her by the arm to his desk. Her mother followed them, sobbing quietly.

"Do you know what you've done, little lady? What would've happened if you were injured? Do you think any of those guys would've helped you? Listen to me: _nobody cares about you_ as you need it. Nobody understands the extreme delicacy of your situation! And judging by this, not even you!"

Toph glanced down and her mother spoke, trembling.

"You lied to us, Toph. You made us believe you were safe in your room, when you were hidden somewhere else, being throwed rocks by men that double your size. And for the entertainment of common people! You could've risked our reputation, daughter"

This phrase made Toph explode.

"Well, nobody knows I'm your daughter, so technically there's no way you could be affected by my talent! I'm the best Earthbender around the world. I hear the earth under my feet until I see things no one else can. Yet you choose to treat me like a disabled baby! I have no place to be myself!"

Her father turned around her, inspecting the Earth Rumble winner belt. Seemingly, he didn't take account of her words.

"I know what we must do. We've given you way too much liberty. From now on, you'll be guarded day and night. I want you to forget any dangerous situation you've ever enjoyed before". Picking up the belt's buckle at Toph's back, Lao untied it and laid it aside. "Now you're good. Go to your room"

"I will not. Give me MY belt. I won it, it's mine!"

"No, it's not! I'll turn it back to the den's owner tomorrow and you'll let it go".

_May them not destroy your life_

_Don't let them go destroying your life_

Suddenly, the thought of her prize in the hands of any of those lily-livers of the Earth Rumble was too much to bear. She didn't even think: she took the belt from the desk, and turning around, she went to her room in a storm.

"Toph, what are you doing, dear?" her mother sobbed.

"Drop it! You'll regret this double tomorrow!"

Suddenly, the door burst open and Toph reappeared in front of her parents with a plastic backpack on her hand.

"I'm leaving. I never had a future here anyway"

Poppy opened her mouth, and Lao extended his hand to grab his daughter's shoulder.

"Let go!" she ordered, contrariated.

"Toph, don't make it harder" warned her father.

_Now it's time for them to leave you_

_Don't risk it more_

_Don't you let their own failures_

_To drag you out and kill you_

"I've made up my mind. Goodbye, mother. See ya"

As she stomped her feet against the tatami, she felt her parents rushing to the door to stop her. Without hesitation, she jumped through the mirror.

"Goodbye, father!" she yelled.

_Close all the doors in your house._

_Close all the doors of your house._

*********************************

As Toph took a cab down the street, she decided to move out from Gaoling since there was nothing in it for her. Besides, she was afraid her parents would bother around. But where could she go?

"That's it. I'm not going any further away from the city" said the taxi driver, distracting her from her thoughts. "You must go down here, little lady".

The pet name of her father annoyed her. 'Little lady', she thought. "Are you leaving a blind girl in the street on her own at the middle of the night?"

"I'm leaving a very capable blind girl in the end of my allowed route".

Toph went down reluctantly, and sat next to the road under a tree.

"I'll have to take the first car I find tomorrow to the train station. I knew I should've started there"

Bending a tent behind a bush, she decided to go to sleep.

"TRAIN TO BA SING SE, LAST CALL!"

Why wouldn't they do a first call, Toph thought angrily as she rushed into the train. Taking a seat, she put on her headphones, turned on her walkman and wondered what she would do once she arrived.

"I hate that city. That's why my parents won't be looking out for me in there"

One late evening, as Aang closed his glider by the bus stop, he heard an odd sound of fighting at the alley. As curious as he was, he decided to show his head by the corner and check out the party.

"HAH! TAKE THAT, YOU BLOCKHEADED, NUT BRAINED LILY-LIVERS!"

With that yell, the source of the sound (a strange, black-haired teenager) broke her fighting pose and took a round around the public, receiving the copper coins from the bets at the end. Finally, she bowed mockingly and retired, throwing a coin in the air. In the meantime, her defeated adversaries tended to their wounds.

She looked so young and fragile that Aang had to supress an exclamation. What about the poverty in the city? And they dared to talk about being prosperous. He decided to follow her, as she picked up a shabby plastic bag from a picket fence and started walking towards a wasteland in the opposite side of the street.

"You at the back, stop following me across the street. I don't want to break you up"

"I want to help you"

The girl turned to face him.

"I need no help" she emphasized. "And I want you to stop there or else I'll be burying you on a hole and leave you there until another earthbender dares to help you"

"Whoa there, I'm sorry. I'm leaving"

Toph sighed heartedly as she bended a tent on the dark wasteland. She didn't notice when the red and blue lights started to flood the place.

While Aang waited for his turn on the queue to enter the bus, he noticed a few cops entering the alley, stopping to talk to the crowd that was still in there. The man of the bets pointed to the other side of the street, and with a nauseating feel, Aang saw a photo of the girl from before on their hands. He leaned aside to hear them talk:

"Guess we've finally found her, huh? A little rebel runaway is going to have a very nice conversation with her parents tonight"

Without thinking twice, Aang opened his glider , pushing a few people from the queue. "I'm sorry!" he yelled from the sky. Flying over the street, he landed next to the tent where the girl was, just as the police lights started to point towards them.

"Hey. Wake up! You have to go!"

"You're the moron from before! I told you to leave me alone!" she yelled, as she started to bend an enormous rock to throw at him.

Aang couldn't help it: moving nimbly, he catched her hands, making her drop the boulder and speaking quickly:

"Listen to me! I wouldn't be bothering you if the cops weren't looking for you at the other side of the street!"

Toph stopped and asked urgently:

"Cops? How many?"

"It doesn't matter! We are not fighting the police! Hold tight to my waist, I'm taking us out of here".

With this, Aang opened his glider.

When the cops arrived to the tent, the place was empty.

As they landed on the university campus, Aang started to explain himself:

"Listen, I'm sorry I carried you away like this. I have a place for you to stay for a while and hide from whatever is bothering you. I don't know why you scaped from your house and I won't judge you for it"

"How do you know I ran away from my house?"

"The cops said it while they were searching for you".

Toph stared at the floor.

"What's your name?"

"Toph Be... Toph".

"I'm Aang. Listen, we are at the university now. You will hide in my room. I'm going to open the window to let us sneak in from there. Wait me here, I'll come back right away"

Before Toph could think about it, Aang was back, helping her through the sky with his glider as they sneaked through the window.

"You can have my bed. I'll be sleeping on the floor. You hungry?"

"No. I'm leaving". The earthbender adjusted her backpack and started walking towards the door.

Aang looked at her with bitter surprise.

"Why? You have nowhere to go! The cops are looking out for you everywhere!"

"I'm not letting a stranger, who might as well be a pervert, have me locked in his room"

Aang sighed. "Toph, listen. I won't be bothering you, I want to help you. You won't be here forever. I'll look out for a place for you to stay as soon as the morning arrives".

Toph relaxed her limbs, leaning her head in the direction of Aang's voice. He could see a faint corageous smile in her face.

"Well, you are not lying. I have the abilitie to tell a lie"

Aang scratched the back of his head and spoke, trying to relieve her.

"I know you have no reason to trust me, but believe me, if anyone in the university notices I have a girl hiding in my room, I might as well be doomed. And I have too much responsibilities at stake to let it be doomed"

Toph knitted her brows.

"Then why are you helping me anyway?"

Aang's face broke into a crooked smile, though he knew she couldn't see it.

"Well, Miss-tell-a-lie-with-my-powers, though you didn't explain me how you can -sorta- see, I'm an open book. I'm the Avatar" he added, seriously. He wasn't bragging. "Helping people is my responsibility".

Toph opened her mouth slightly with surprise, the she let out a sigh. She took a seat next to Aang in the bench.

"Well, you got me there, Mr Avatar. I'll tell you all about my 'vision' "

The night was young, and adrenaline fell off their shoulders as Toph explained, very proudly indeed, all about her ability to sense the world around with her bare feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YouTube Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv  
> Song's name: Que no destrocen tu vida - Los Prisioneros (May them not destroy your life - The Prisoners)


	4. A Tough, One of a Kind Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a Toph chapter. I hope I got her personality on point.  
> Youtube playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

Aang opened the door. "Hey? Toph?"

"I'm here, Twinkle-toes. I haven't gone anywhere"

"It's not that. I just wanted to see if you where awake"

"Well, you already woke me up. Guess you should at least be floating over the room not to do it"

"Actually, I can. Don't worry, I'll do that from now on"

Aang took a seat at the bench and turned on the light. He went to the mirror: looking at his reflection, he came back to himself, remembering the events of the night. He tried to picture Katara in the reflection, her pretty hair over his shoulder as they swayed to rock music.

"You smell like seaweed lotion"

Aang stopped abruptly and glanced back at her.

"You know, there is this water tribe girl..."

Toph sighed as she shoved off the blankets to sit on the edge of the bed. "Look, Twinkle-toes, I'm not the best one for love advice. I've been sheltered my whole life and I've never seen a guy who isn't twice my age, and only to kick his nuts to wipe the floor with'em"

Aang laughed heartedly.

"Well, you don't have to advice me. I just danced with her. She was so pretty and I couldn't help the wish to ask her to dance"

"Then why on earth is her smell all over the place?"

Aang flushed.

"Well, we danced pretty closely"

"How closely?"

"Well, she was..." Aang tried to point to his chin, but then he understood Toph's seismic sense wouldn't get it. Leaning from the bench, he quickly touched Toph's jaw with a finger "... here"

"Wow. That's pretty close... and hot, too"

"I know. I've never danced with a girl like that. But I've never been to a disco, either. I got carried away"

"Well, I've only been to gambling dens and fighting arenas. I've never danced anything but my mom's dumb balads"

Aang smiled, leaping out from his seat. He diriged to the radio-casette he had over his desk and picked one from his collection - the one he knew that fitted the best for the ocasion.

"Aang, what are you doing?"

"You cannot go around without knowing what dancing feels like".

"Aang..."

"Just give it a chance"

He pressed play to his own copy of Maniac, fresh from the radio. Toph raised her head expectantly.

_Just a steel town girl on a Saturday night_   
_Looking for the fight of her life_   
_In the real-time world n_ _o one sees her at all_   
_They all say she's crazy_

Aang helped Toph to her feet. Reluctantly, the girl stood still, breathing awkwardly. Her usual bravado was wearing off to shyness. Aang took some distance to help her feel comfortable.

"See - I mean, feel, - you don't need vision to dance. You only have to let the music flow through your body". Gingerly, the earthbender started to move her fingers to the fast beats. "You can move your feet, stomp them, whatever you like"

_Locking rhythm to the beat of her heart_   
_Changing movement into light_   
_She has danced into the danger zone_   
_When the dancer becomes the dance_

Toph started to sway her torso slightly to the sides, raising the contrary feet. Suddenly, a half grin showed at her face. "It's like bending!" she exclaimed.

"Yes, it is. And you know exactly how to do it"

_It can cut you like a knife if the gift becomes the fire_   
_On the wire between will and what will be_

Aang watched her from the distance, letting the earthebender express herself. Her movements were strong, almost mechanic, with fast stomps on the floor and raising arms. But she had some grace of her own, the result of an unique personality on a one-of-a-kind girl. "You have some crazy moves, Toph"

The girl smiled. She knew he wasn't lying. From this she took courage to jump slightly, regaining her usual impetus, throwing her open hands in the air.

_She's a maniac, maniac on the floor _

_ And she's dancing like she's never danced before _

Aang raised from the floor and, taking her hands, started to sway them heartedly to the sides. Toph laughed, raptured by the music, and pushed him playfully to the side. "This is my moment, Twinkle-toes. Give some space!" And she throwed a side-kick.  


_ On the ice-blue line of insanity is a place most never see _   
_I t's a hard-won place of mystery: touch it, but can't hold it_   
_ You work all your life for that moment in time _   
_ It could come or pass you by _

As the song faded away, Toph collapsed to the bed. "You know, that's a very good training. I missed moving my feet"

"Yeah, you have rythm, Toph"

"Thank you. I think I needed it"

Aang rested his head over his elbow on the bench. "You haven't told me how old are you, Toph"

"I turned seventeen this spring"

"We are the same age. I turned seventeen last week. But then I guess the police will be searching you for one year on, at most"  


Toph laughed half-heartedly. "Huh, yeah, the police can stop looking for me, but my parents would do anything to take me back even if I was thirty"

Aang looked at her. Her face had turned dim. "Why did you escape home, Toph?"

"Being blind is not a problem for me, but it's a terrible issue for my parents. They think I shouldn't be able to take care of myself. I thought they were looking after me, but now I'm sure they were just looking after themselves"

Aang peered from the bench. "Why?"

"Last year, I was at the Earth Rumble Arena, waiting for my turn to fight, when I overheard two of my father's associates placing a gamble with the host. I was so scared they would recognize me, but when I overheard their talk, I couldn't believe it"

"What did they say?"

"He said: 'Lucky for us, Lao has no heir for the business. I guess we'll have to work the dirt off to have a piece of the cake'. And the other one answered, 'Yeah, Lao and Poppy have no children' "

"You mean they were hiding you?!" Aang couldn't believe it. It was horridly selfish and he couldn't see why a parent would deny a child, much less a talented one like Toph.

"Yes, Aang. They were telling everyone they had no child of their own. So, whenever people visit the house, they must think I'm a relative or a boarder"

Aang shaked his head. "You should be the pride of any parent"

"I know. I'm the best earthbender in the world. But not for them"

Aang couldn't find an answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who says blind people don't know how to dance? I've heard it, and it's awful. Definitely, those who think that don't know anything about life.  
> Song in this chapter: Maniac - Michael Sempello


	5. What Love Is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Youtube playlist:  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

That Sunday before classes, a lot of students woke up to an awful headache and sore feet. Last night's party had been a success: now, some fresh made couples and newly known friends were down at the green areas, taking leisurely strolls. Some of them even were heading out to a first date on town or to meet the city.

Glancing through the window, Aang sighed. He wished he were down there. But he was committed to his new friend's wellbeing.

Toph had noticed it, and she felt rather obtrusive. It's not that she wouldn't like to be downstairs rather than caged on a plain dorm room, but she could've handled it if Aang wasn't sighing all day. After all, she had been on a golden cage her whole life.

"Hey, Twinkle-toes"

Aang almost jumped from his nook next to the window. "Huh?"

"Seriously, you don't have to be locked up with me all day. Just hand me a Braille book and some music to listen and I'll be cool on my own. Then you can go down and meet your girlfriend"

Aang turned to face her, flushing slightly. " Girlfriend? But I haven't even went on a date with her!"

Toph spoke matter-of-factly. "Then you can have the first one right now. C'mon, Loverboy, just get out and let me listen to my own thoughts"

Aang leaped from the bed and, taking his glider, he took Toph on a quick hug. "Thank you!"

Toph smiled as Aang left the room. She didn't even care about the book, she just wanted to play some music on the radio and chill. However, barely five minutes after, Aang opened the door again to slide a hand and place a book, fresh from the library, over the bench.

"Sorry! Almost forgot it!"

The earthbender laughed lively.

It was a warm Summer day, and being used to the coldest climate, Katara chose to wear a mustard-yellow dress with fringes at the end, cyan details all over the edges. She felt rather pretty and light as she sat under a tree, with her Anatomy book and her glasses on. She intended to repass for tomorrow's first day of classes, and she was doing fine on her own until a girl with dark hair spikes appeared from the back of the tree.

"Fresh. I've found the girl who was dancing with the Avatar last night!"

Katara stopped abruptly, looking at the mocking girl's green eyes. "The Avatar?"

"Yeah way, the dude you were dancing to. It's, like, so warped, isn’t it? He's like, sixteen? I don't know how he got there. Must be a relative of some student, otherwise I don't know how he knew about the party"

Katara was so shocked that she couldn't answer. The Avatar? She had almost kissed a 16-year-old boy! The odd girl laughed.

"Sorry, I blew up your mind. Take a chill pill, girl. No big deal. See ya!"

And she left Katara alone. As soon as she was away, Katara went back to the book, but she couldn't concentrate.

"I knew I'd find you at the School of Nurses gardens". The airbender closed his glider next to her and beamed.

"Aang!" The girl leaped from under the tree and faced him, unsure about her smile. She grinned a little bit.

He sounded so pleased of himself: "I told you I was going to find you".

Katara looked at him, the uneasiness of the scene before hanging in the air. She squared her shoulders slightly, before gravely inquiring:

"Why didn't you tell me you were sixteen? And why didn't you tell me you are the Avatar?!"

Aang's smile faded into a crooked grin. Katara felt amazed: how could he be _so_ chill? His voice was amicable and pleasant. "Whoa there, I don't go around telling everyone I'm the Avatar. I don't want to sound like bragging, y'know? And as for my age... well, I _was_ sixteen until last week. I'm seventeen now"

Katara sighed, but still had one doubt. "If you're barely seventeen, then how come you are here, at the university?"

"I was always one grade forward. My teachers passed me in high school. Now I study Anthropology here"

Katara's defenses relaxed, and she lowered her shoulders, sighing. "I'm sorry. I got pretty messed up. It's just that this girl came here just to tease me about dancing with an underage Avatar"

Aang laughed nervously. "Well, I guess she was annoying. But you shouldn't let it get to you. I'm sure you do pretty amazing on your own" he added, pointing toward Katara's anatomy book. The girl smiled.

"I had nothing to do, so I was catching up with the classes". Her smile got shyer, and she raised a hand to put her hair behind her ear, next to the tip of her glasses.

"But there are no classes yet" stated Aang as a matter of fact. He opened one arm to the side, pointing towards the city. "Why don't you come with me? I heard there are some amazing tea houses near here"

Katara couldn't resist the shine of his eyes. "Okay, okay, you got me there. Let's go!"

The Jasmine Dragon was a cozy, dignified and nice-smelling tea house, located a few streets away from the University at the inner ring of Ba Sing Se. Traveling by air, anyway, it was barely five minutes before Aang landed in front of the shop, with Katara holding to his back.

"I like it here. Seems nice"

"Yeah and I know the owner". Aang guided her through the door, beaming. "Miss Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, I welcome you to..."

"... The Jasmine Dragon" added a rugged, soft-spoken voice at the side of the door. An elder man greeted them with an Earth Kingdom style curtsy.

"Uncle Iroh!" exclaimed Aang, gathering the old man on a hug.

"Avatar Aang. I was hoping I'd catch you here one of these days. Zuko told me you were entering university this year". Iroh placed both hands over Aang's shoulders, looking at him fondly at the eyes.

"Yes, I got accepted into the School of Anthropologists"

"Really? Are you going to measure other people's heads?" asked Iroh, very attentive.

"That's... a misconception. You don't have to measure up things. That's an old practice that didn't age well"

"I see" Iroh answered thoughtfully. "And who might be this nice lady?"

Aang flushed but decided to let Katara speak for herself. The girl took the cue gratefully.

"I'm Katara from the Southern Water Tribe"

Iroh's gaze seemed to evocate distant memories. "Ah, the South Pole will always hold a special place on my heart. I learned a lot from your people, and I owe one of my best Firebending technique to Waterbenders. I hope I get to know you as well, Miss Katara" - and he nodded kindly.

Katara returned the nod with a smile. "Thank you. It's really heartwarming to see my people being appreciated this far from home"

"You welcome" added the man, as he gestured towards an intimate table next to the window. Aang and Katara sat on the wooden chairs, very grateful for the warm greeting. "What would you like to drink? I have Lychee nuts for today's special, brewed in a base of White tea"

"I'll go with the special" said Katara, clasping her both hands.

"I'd like some White Dragon bush tea, thank you very much. Oh - and that egg custard pie!". Aang pointed towards the counter.

"What will the lady have to eat?"

"Oh! I... I'd like some crab ramen". Katara gently returned the menu to Iroh's hands.

Iroh approached to the counter and took out a small paper box with a floral design.

"Courtesy of the house" he said, placing it on the table. Aang opened the box, curious.

"It's wagashi! Oh, and it smells of Moon peaches - they're my favorites! Thank you very much" and he beamed warmly.

Iroh's smile got nostalgic. "I've really missed having family around. Welcome back to Ba Sing Se, Aang. I hope I'll see you around more often"

"You surely will. I'll be bringing university students to binge on your ramen and booze on your tea in no time"

Toph headbanged at the rhythm of Aang's rock music. "I'll need something harder really soon", she thought, as Deep Purple's guitar chords faded away. It was weird to be locked in a room, not being able to look by the window but perceiving all kind of things from the adjacent rooms. To the left, there was a boy who liked to do aerobics by the music of a tsungi horn; in front of her room, there was a girl who was always moving the furniture from one side to another. And there was this weirdo that was always flushing the toilet, at the other side of the right wall.

She took a seat by the window, picking up the book that Aang had lent her. She read the title and smiled. "Bagdermoles and Earthbending: Animal Inspired Movements for Experts". She stood up and decided to practice. Though there was no earth for her to bend, she was sure she could remember everything by the time she could come out and get dirty.

At the same time in Gaoling, Poppy was sitting in the middle of Toph's room, clutching a green-white silk dress, soaking it with tears, inhaling the faint smell of lychee fruit that emanated from her daughter's clothes.

"So, why Anthropology?" Katara sipped her tea again, enjoying the tart sweetness of the tea.

"I'm a Nomad. I've lived my whole life traveling, and I've seen so many things that I want to know about people around the world. Anthropology studies all those cultures and tries to understand them on their own"

"Sounds interesting. I've lived my whole life in the South Pole, but sometimes I go to the Northern Water tribe"

"You got family there?"

"Only far relatives, but mostly I went to know how other waterbenders fight and bend. To my biggest surprise, they didn't teach women... only healing for us"

"That's awfully sexist. I tried to talk them into teaching women when I went there, but not even the Avatar can change culture. There is a limit between tradition and sexism, anyway"

"Most women there don't want to be fighters"

"I know, I only did it because the Council invited me to a reunion where they talked about this girl who wanted to learn to fight Northern style"

"Oh, really? And who was it?". Suddenly, Katara seemed very interested.

Aang glazed to the window into the warm, golden afternoon. "I don't know. I never saw her, and I left that noon after the awful meeting. Only thing I know is that same night, the girl challenged Master Pakku on a fight, and though she didn't win, he took her as disciple"

Suddenly, Katara burst in laughter, clutching her necklace. "I can't believe it!"

Aang turned to look at her, half confused and half returning the smile. "Why?"

"I was that girl, Aang. I defied Master Pakku, and when the fight was over, he saw this". Katara unclutched the necklace, displaying it affectionately in front of Aang's eyes. "You know what it is, Aang?"

"It's a Northern Water tribe betrothal necklace"

"Exactly. It was from my grandmother, and she gave it to my mother, who gave it to me. I never knew it was a betrothal necklace, we don't have that tradition in the South. But Master Pakku recognized it immediately. He carved it for my Gran-gran"

"He was betrothed to your grandma?!" Aang lowered the piece of egg custard pie he was going to bite.

"Yes, Aang. And my Gran-gran left her own people so they couldn't dictate her life. When Gran-Pakku saw my necklace, he knew it was his destiny to mend the same thinking that had led my grandma to leave him"

"It's amazing" whispered Aang in impression. "But - why Granpakku?"

"Pakku changed a lot after that incident. He realized he could understand my grandma's decision. In all his life, he never got married... until four years ago, when he came to meet my Gran-gran to tell her he was sorry"

Aang glazed at her with surprise. "That's incredible! It's a lifetime of love". Suddenly, he blushed at his own enthusiasm, glaring down the table. "I mean... it's great that your Gran-gran and Pakku got to an understanding". And he rubbed the back of his neck.

Katara smiled coyly, her cheeks warm as she left her empty cup of tea over the table. "Yeah, it's a beautiful love story"

Aang sipped the last bit of tea. "Want to see something beautiful?". Katara nodded in response, a smile flickering at the edges of her lips.

Aang took her by the hand, making Katara remember the night before, when they had danced loosely. Now, his movements were light again, as he guided her to the front of the tea shop, where a small pool reflected the orange light of sunset. Far away, they could see the silhouettes of the city, its vibrant liveliness pushing through startlingly. A bird sang closely, and a ballad came from a faraway shop.

_I want to know what love is, I want you to show me_   
_I want to feel what love is, I know you can show me_

Katara took the view: the clouds were as colorful as a rainbow over the old-fashioned skyline. The song came faintly to her ears, and she enjoyed it. She was a real romantic, and the thought of it made her redden as Aang stepped beside her, leaning over the balcony to enjoy the view.

Suddenly, there were no words enough as Katara stood closely, looking at him with well-hidden expectation.

_I'm going to take a little time, a little time to look around me_   
_I've got nowhere left to hide, it looks like love has finally found me_

Aang's gaze got distant, almost timeless, like a magic spell. He pulled the girl on a warm embrace. Katara's heart leaped in surprise, but her inner self recognized that it was, in a way, better than a kiss. The hug meant 'thank you', and she returned it gently.

For an instant they stood, releasing their deep loneliness in the embrace. He was the Avatar, the unique force of the world; she was Katara, the motherly force of a motherless family. But now, suddenly, they were nothing else than young, free and willed beings, erupting in a care-free smile over each other’s shoulders.

_In my life there's been heartache and pain_   
_I don't know if I can face it again_   
_Can't stop now, I've traveled so far, to change this lonely life_

She was so close, and he could feel the smell of her hair, something between lotus flower and fresh sea breeze. He inhaled it heartedly, before the girl broke the hug, looking at him with shiny eyes. She peered closer, enjoying the closeness of his warm body, approaching her face to Aang's. He took the cue: grabbing her elbows gently, he closed the distance between their lips.

_I want to know what love is, I want you to show me  
I want to feel what love is, I know you can show me_

So warm, so heart-warming, the timid lightness of the kiss deepened like a wave. Aang unfolded Katara's mouth, placing a cherishing hand over her cheek, and the girl's lips uncurled like a flower. They were so full, so rich and so smooth... The waterbender tightened the embrace, tasting Aang's upper lip carefully.

_Let's talk about love, I want to know what love is_   
_The love that you feel inside, I want you to show me_   
_And I'm feeling so much love, I want to feel what love is_   
_No, you just can't hide, I know you can show me_

Aang took Katara's face between his hands, softly tasting her lower lip. She caressed the back of his neck, panting as he tangled his hands between her dark-brown locks.

At some moment Iroh peered from the door, looking for Aang, but stopped with a smile on his face at the sight of young love. Stealthily, he went back.

  
_I want to know what love is, I know you can show me_   
_I want to feel it too, I want to feel what love is_   
_I want to feel it too, and I know and I know, I know you can show me_   
_Show me love is real, yeah, I want to know what love is_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got extended on Iroh's parts. I really enjoy writing them, and I feel that fanfic writers don't usually extend on him - maybe I haven't searched well - or maybe I'm just Iroh addicted! However, Deep Purple's alleged song won't be on the Youtube list, since I decided to leave it to imagination. You can picture Toph headbanging at whatever DP track you want to - and let me know which one you prefer at the comments below.
> 
> Song in this chapter: I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner


	6. Deep Crimson Silk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally our Hotman appears here! I was so impatient to get to this point.  
> Enjoy with music (remember to pause the playlist at the chapter's song) https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

The sun was setting, and he was walking through the roads of Ember Island, heading to the only bar who seemed to be open this time of the year. Why his sister had insisted on having him coming to the party, he couldn't tell, but now he was longing for a bed and some rock music on the radio.

He had become taller than ever, his face so handsome that the scar on his face only seemed to add more dimension to the deepness of his eyes. However, his red flannel shirt seemed to take off almost every sign of royalty from his body, except for the poised walking and the sheer elegance of his black leather pants.

The bar was dim on the outside, and solitary: the closest villa was at least one mile away, and there were some high end cars at the parking. Gingerly, Zuko opened the heavy wood doors, chaped in gold.

Azula smiled at her image in the mirror on the private toilette. She looked so perfect; no, perfect wasn't the word, her therapist had said. Pretty, that was it: just pretty. She adjusted the neck of her wine-red power suit. It was a loose jumpsuit, and the pants hanged loosely around her hips. The shoulder pads were the best - she loved this trend, and she intended to make the most of it until it faded away. Her hair was the only thing that escaped from the trendiness - it fell decadently over her shoulders, so silky and dark that she could almost see her reflection over it.

Next to her, Ty Lee added the final touch of rosy cream blush at the highest of her cheekbones. Azula glanced at her friend's round legs, all exposed by the rosewood colored leotard she wore. She had become so beautiful- well, she had always been pretty, but now it hitted Azula differently. Maybe it was the fact that, after all this months of court-ordered therapy sessions, Azula's emotions were clearer and less poisoned.

"You look amazing as always, Azula" said Ty-Lee with a candid grin, not expecting an answer.

"You too" was the mild answer. And it meant the world for Ty Lee to have this reaffirmation - after all this time, Azula was doing well. She giggled a little bit before asking eagerly:

"Do you think they'll find out?"

"They will, and I don't care. It's freaking the hell out of me to see her behaving like a 15-year-old punk. She needs to get a grip of something and veg ASAP"

With this, the girls left out of the powder room.

It was evident, from the first moment he came in, that Zuko had joined a sort of ritual. All the boys and girls around the party were wearing leather, whether real or fake: black suede, vinyl, tight mini-skirts and jackets, even dresses. At the bar there was an auburn-haired boy with tight black pants and a scarlet red Poet shirt.

Everyone had turned to face Zuko, and the boy at the bar stood up, looking at him quizzically. The Fire prince felt rather startled by this, and he was going to turn back and leave when his sister's voice came from the back of the room.

"Don't, Lee" ordered Azula plainly, appearing from behind a red velvet curtain. Suddenly, everyone got quiet, and tended back to their own business. A faint sound of dark waves music came from a nearby speaker.

Zuko approached to his sister, his arms hanging limply at his sides. "Well, I'm here. What shall we do?"

Azula smiled and approached to the bar. "Just take a sit, brother, and I'll fix you a drink. Dragonfruit?"

Zuko nodded, unsure of what to say. Azula stirred some Dragonfruit pulp and sake on a gold rimmed glass, before handing it to his brother. "Here you are. How are you, Zuzu?"

"I'm fine, thank you. How's therapy going?"

"Oh, you know, they say I'm mental, but nothing I cannot master like a pro. Being here makes it easier, though, otherwise I don't know if I could handle the tedium". She sounded so like herself, yet so different. She was evidently taking it easier, and Zuko smiled softly at this. The music changed from dark waves to new waves as in cue, making the atmosphere feel lighter and luminous in comparison.

Suddenly, Lee, who was turning his back, spun around over the stool to tell Azula: "She's coming"

"You are such a weirdo. I know she's coming". Azula looked back at him depreciatingly. It was evident that the Lee guy was a fool or stoned.

"She's coming" he repeated.

Everyone had turned to see the door next to the bar, at the back of the room, as the velvet curtain shifted to the side.

_She'll only come out at nights_

_The lean and hungry type_

_Nothing is new_

_I've seen her here before_

It was a tall, dim girl on a long, crimson red Qipao. Her hair was long and jet-black: it felt straight over her shoulders, much like Azula's, but it was so unchastingly long, enhancing way too much the roundness of her breasts and waist. She went and took a sit over the counter of the bar, crossing her legs solicitously. The Lee guy approached to her; his eyes fixed on the intoxicating figure.

The dress was ripped at the side, and the opening showed most of her leg, the longest Zuko had ever saw: the skin was so fair that it almost had a whimsical glow. The girl took a blow out of her cigarette holder: a long, teasing gold stick with rubies embedded. As she blew off the smoke, she glanced back at Zuko, her dark eyes darkening.

And that's when Zuko recognized her. So many months have passed since the last time he saw her: that day, there were tears on his eyes, and she had dried her own ones by the hardening of her heart. Lee, sitting at her feet over the stool, gazed at her with poorly hidden awe.

_Watching and waiting_

_Oh, she's sitting' with you_

_But her eyes are on the door_

"Mai!" Zuko stood up, approaching to her. Lee got up, looking at him defiantly, with eyes that questioned him why he dared bother his Goddess.

Mai raised a dismissive hand. "It's okay, Lee, chill down". Lee sat back reluctantly, placing a possessive hand over the edge of Mai's qipao.

Zuko draw near and faced Mai. "How is it going? It... it's been a long time"

S _o many have paid to see_

_What you think you're getting' for free_

_The woman is wild_

_A she-cat tamed b_ y _the purr of a Jaguar_

Mai blew the smoke blandly over Zuko's face. "I'm fine, thank you". As always, her cold demeanor hid so well the many feelings she had. Zuko knew she was emotional, he knew her so much; but now, she was different. Perhaps it was because she had never been a seductress - until now; perhaps it was the fact she was wearing dark lipstick and the boldness of her lips was almost astonishing. Zuko found nothing else to say, and Lee's freezing cold gaze was insufferable, so he came back to the table next to Azula.

"I can't believe it" he said, stirring his beverage dispiritedly. "She's changed so much"

Azula shrugged. "Well, it's just a phase, you know"

Zuko looked back at his sister. "But she's never wore face paint. And she has a boyfriend"

Azula sighed. "It's called _makeup_ , Zuzu. And, seriously, do you see that bogus? He won't last long. It's just her new boy toy. I give him two weeks and a half, if he doesn't spoil it by the end of the first. Mai hates pretentious wannabes, specially junkies"

"How many has she had?" asked Zuko, discouraged.

"I think this is the eighth in the span of a year"

"Fuck" was the dry answer.

"Oh, spare the swearing. She's coming"

_Oh, here she comes_   
_Watch out boy she'll chew you up_   
_Oh here she comes_   
_She's a maneater_

Mai stood up next to Zuko, leaning her hip on the table. "Hey" she said, putting out the cigarette. "I know I haven't seen you around for a long time, but I don't want things to be weird between us"

"Neither do I. Listen, Mai, I'm..."

"Save the excuses. It's all in the past now"

Zuko sighed. "...Okay. I just wanted to say I'm sorry"

Mai looked back at him, her eyes indecipherable. "You're so naive, Zuko. You think everything can go back to normal by saying you're sorry. I said I don't want things to be weird, not to be like they used to be"

Zuko raised from the chair. "I didn't mean that, Mai. I haven't even said that I want you back. I just wanted to apologize" his voice raised slightly, and noticing it, he sat back, pinching the bridge of his nose. "This is so messed up. I'm leaving"

Azula got up from the seat, annoyed. "You two are acting like real idiots. First, Mai shouldn't be acting like a hard-to-get prom queen, when no one but the lad with the stupid shirt has tried to hit on you. And Zuko is so pathetic as to leave whenever something goes off"

The alluded ones hushed bearishly, and Azula continued speaking. "Listen, I called you to hang out, just the four of us like the old times. We are adults now and you can at least behave as such and don't barf me out"

Ty Lee appeared from behind the bar counter with a freshly prepared Ash banana punch. "What's the problem, Azula?"

Azula turned back and faced her, accepting the drink. "It's nothing. We're heading out and leaving the private party for this oddballs"

"Are we?" asked Zuko, puzzled.

"Yes, we are" asseverated Mai, folding her cigarette holder into her purse. She was dying to head out and leave Lee behind.

They got on the car, with Ty Lee at the wheel. Zuko noted that Azula had got away with her cocktail and laughed a bit. Mai side-glanced at him, her arms crossed. After Azula's berate, they felt slightly embarrassed.

Ty Lee drove through the rammed-dirt roads with a carefree glow all over her face. She was so breezy that Mai felt almost envious. Throughout all these months after the breakup, she had felt utterly alone. And her brief matings were nothing but a waste of time. As in cue, Ty Lee glanced at her from the rearview mirror with a grin to ask her: "So, how's it going with Lee?"

She was innocent enough as to take seriously each and all of Mai's flings. She was a supporter of any of her friend's decisions, whether they were of her liking or not. She didn't feel in the place to judge and that was a blessing after all - not being pointed with the finger. Anyway, now it felt like a spit in the face, perhaps given the fact that Zuko was sitting next to Mai right now.

"He is so lame and possessive" she answered, looking through the window. "I don't think it will work"

"Well, don't worry, Mai. You can't expect the right one to just appear on the corner. Besides, you really should enjoy yourself and let go those expectations"

"Or break your own record of the shortest date" laughed Azula recklessly.

Mai scowled. "You mind your own business"

Azula got quiet, sipping her cocktail, but a smile played at the corners of her lips. She could clearly see that Mai and her brother were still drawn to each other.

Though no one said anything, they knew they were heading to the private beach.

The sun had long fallen down the horizon, but Zuko lighted up a bonfire. They sat over the sand, looking at the flames thoughtfully. Mai took a cigarette out of her purse, struggling to light it up at the jumping flames.

"Here" said Zuko, lighting up a fire on his left palm. Mai gave in and approached her cigarette to the flame, sensing way too much the unintentional touch of Zuko's hand over hers.

"Thank you". She blew an unsparing amount of smoke as to disperse the thoughts.

"So, what have you been up to, Zuko?" asked Ty Lee.

"Well, not much. I've been to college at Capital City and now I want to apply for an exchange to the University of Ba Sing Se"

"Oh, really? And why would you do that? We have the finest professors here at the Fire Nation" brought out Azula.

Zuko gazed sheepishly at the flames.

"You know how it works. Therapist said it'd be better to go for a change of scenery"

Now Azula stood quietly sipping her drink. Therapist had told her to look for a change, too - but she loved too much the Fire Nation as to leave completely. She had decided to go to Ember Island instead. It was the only place where she could be free.

Ty Lee leant on her elbow, glaring at her friends' faces. "Well, I don't know if _I_ could go to a therapist. They're so distant and structured. Yoga has helped me a lot... and reiki, too"

"Some things cannot be helped by physical therapy, Ty Lee" added Mai coldly. Everyone turned to stare at her. "What? I've never been to therapy, but I know how it works. I know you well enough as to realize you cannot solve some things via stretches"

Azula emptied her vase. "You're right, they cannot. Anyway, at some point anything could help you, if you're inundated by thoughts that are not your own at all"

"You mean drugs?" Zuko gazed at her, feeling an echo of dread, somewhere, deep inside. He had never been psychotic - but Azula had. Now she spoke openly of it, not giving a damn about what people thought about it.

"Yes, I'm on drugs, psychiatric drugs, if that's what you're wondering, Zuzu. But it's no big deal if I have one drink, after all. When have you seen me losing control? I'm Fire Princess Azula, not some drunkard peasant"

"No, I didn't mean that. You are always nifty"

"That's what I've heard" smiled Azula.

Mai finished smoking her cigarette. "If someone told me long ago that I'd see Azula admitting being less than perfect, I'd have eaten my stilettos"

"You can try, I'm not going to stop you" mocked Azula.

"Real nice, Princess" said Mai, looking at Azula though her black nails "but I mean it. You've progressed fine by yourself"

"It's cause I'm the boss" emphasized Azula - but she was smiling.

"When will _you_ start looking up, Mai?" asked Ty Lee, absent-mindedly with an innocent voice.

"What do you mean?" Mai's tone, unlike Ty Lee's, was suspicious.

"Oh, come on, Mai" said Azula mighty seriously "you know what Ty Lee means. You have been living on a prayer since you dumped Zuko"

Zuko coughed awkwardly, expecting an outburst - but Mai simply sighed.

"You may have a point. I'm getting really tired of jumping from one asshole to another"

Azula saved her mocking remarks about _literally_ jumping. After all, this was a great advance: Mai finally recognized something was going wrong.

Gazing at the dancing flames, Mai continued speaking. "I've been thinking about moving out from my house and leave the Fire Nation". Everyone turned to look at her, stunned, and she went on stoically. "I've never liked living here after all"

"But... where would you go?" wondered Ty Lee, startled.

"I'd go wherever there is some fun and novelty"

"Then why haven't you done it?" asked Azula.

Another sigh. "I don't know"

"Please. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You know well enough you are free to go. Just move on, nobody will stop you"

Mai glanced at Zuko, her eyes hidden by her long fringe. "You're right. Nobody can stop me anymore"

A few minutes after, the group went back to the Royal beach house, a silent atmosphere preceding to a long -and much smoother- night of Pai Sho.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was delayed a little bit because of college among other things. I hope you enjoy Mai's arc as presented on this fic. I've always seen her as extremely complex, and a lesser role at a kid's show wouldn't do justice to it.  
> Songs in this chapter: Maneater - Hall & Oates


	7. Therapy Session - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tags said it and I always keep my promises. An Azula x Therapy chapter.  
> CW for physical and psychological abuse.  
> Past intrusive thoughts are italized.

From some weeks on, the atmosphere at the house had changed. The kids were not aware of their parents’ situation: they had always seen them as different beings, so different that they always expected the opposite from each one.

From some weeks on, Azula had noticed that her mother was always at Zuko's side, and the thought of being left apart was puzzling her. But her father was always there to take her somewhere - to watch fights on TV, take strolls at the gardens and talk about her troubled feelings. To be honest, anyway, her father didn't mind too much about her childish sentiments: but he gave her "advice", and that was all she needed.

"They're running away from us, Azula. They know we are stronger and better than them"

At the beginning, Azula had resisted the thought - but now her heart embraced it, given the fact she was never at her mother's side like Zuko did. Indeed, her mother was always there to play with her, watch her Firebending exercises and read her books. Little knew Azula about her father's interventions; she ignored the fact that, anytime Ursa looked for her, Ozai was always ready to have Azula for himself. Consequently, mother and daughter missed each other. One time she asked for Mom, and the mild answer was "you are with me now".

The kids didn't know that, six weeks ago, Ozai and Ursa had engaged on a terrible discussion - Ozai's possessiveness and ego was the detonating, like always, but he put the blame on his wife.

Ursa trembled remembering the feeling of Ozai's inhumane hands at her arm. He had slapped her, of course, but at least this time he didn't use firebending. His voice was a hoarse whisper in front of her face: she could feel the smell of mint from his breath.

"How'd you like the worst, ugliest, poorest of all Fire Nation orphanages to put your bastard son there and forget his own name? I bet a former Prince would get his fair share of beatings from all the other baseborns, don't you think?" Ursa stared at him quietly, feeling her mother instinct raising from the tamed stun of her heart. Ozai got angry at this, shaking her by the arm again. "Answer me!"

"No, I don't think so" answered Ursa with a voice that wasn't like her own. "I'd die before you dared do anything with my children"

"Oh, spare me your shitty mother behavior. I wouldn't touch Azula. She's smart and mighty, just like me"

Ursa bent her head down, the fear coming back to her after her short rampage. "You can't treat Azula and Zuko differently. You know they're both your children. I have never touched anyone but you" and she held back the nausea from the thought - the image of Ozai's silent savageness at the end of their marriage bed, the insolent grip of his hand at her thighs, ruthless, unhearing of her inexperience. How he had raised from the darkness of her hair, hushing her cries of pain with a cold kiss of obligation, just to continue hurting her.

Ozai, unaware of her awful remembrances, conceded the truth. "Anyway, you've just behaved like a spoiled brat. So, you'd prefer Zuko wasn't my child, isn't it? Now you'll have it. He won't even see the throne"

"You are not going to -" started Ursa angrily. Ozai's smile started to grow on his face: a sadistic grin. Yes, he could perfectly hurt Zuko. Ursa's stomach sank.

Silently, she decided to never let Zuko alone in the hands of his father.

An eight-years-old girl walked next to her father through the hallway. The tall, imposing figure spoke as they passed in front of the window.

They gazed at the image outside. In the gardens, Zuko and Ursa fed the turtleducks, the boy lying lazily over his mother’s skirt. Azula felt a pinch of jealousy disturbing her chest.

“You see them, Azula?” The girl nodded expectantly. “They’re **weak**! They’re not like us”

Azula looked up at her father in awe. He continued. “The world is entirely made for the powerful. The weaker ones can only expect us to tame their instincts and let them live under our rule. You heard me, Azula? Once you’re the Firelord, I expect you to rule ruthlessly”

“The Firelord? But… what about Zuko?”

“He is as weak as his mother and he is not up to the expectations of the throne. But as for you, Azula, you’ve always been a smart girl. You are eager to learn and that’s why I’ll make you my heir”

She didn’t care about the throne right now. But, as it dispersed the jealousy from her heart, Azula took the compliment gratefully.

That night, Azula passed from the runway to her room when she heard her parents arguing. It wasn’t uncommon, but an uncanny arousal made her duck behind a pot and listen. This time, it was her mother the angry one: that was unheard of.

“Listen to me, Ozai. I know what you’re doing. I won’t let you put my children against each other!”

“You hurt me, my dear wife. You know they are mine, too. Don’t worry, I won’t hurt Azula. She’s smart and mighty, just like me”

“I see what you want to do. You’re turning Azula into a monster!”

“Oh, that’s how you call me, too. Would you rather have her become a dicky weakling like Zuko?”

That was enough for her. Azula slipped back to her room to bury her head over her pillows.

Azula sat on the chair in front of her therapist. She was angry enough. She couldn’t stand the fact she was here, specially right after her father’s imprisonment. Her father did nothing wrong – well, it could be wrong to the law, but his motifs were perfectly accurate and the law stupid enough as to oversee them.

_“Her Royal Highness Azula and His Royal Highness Zuko have suffered severe abuse and alienation from their father. In consequence, they must assist to therapy sessions until this court finds them self-sufficient”_

“Listen, Princess Azula, I know as well as you do that you don’t want to be here”

He was expecting an answer, but she remained silent. So, they wanted her to talk, huh? Oh, no, she wouldn’t talk. She wasn’t going to give them material to prosecute her father even more. The therapist, for his part, observed her patiently. She needed time and he intended to give it to her. After all, he had numerous ideas about how to approach her – he would only use them in time. The session went on in silence, and when the time was over, Azula went back home feeling savage.

The next day, Zhang presented her a reproduction of an old family picture.

“Your mother is worried about you” he said.

“What do you mean by handing me this trash?” she spoke for the first time.

“I want you to look at your mother’s face in the picture and tell me what you think she was feeling at the moment”

“I’m not doing that, and you perfectly know it”.

The therapist gazed at her thoughtfully.

“You know, I’ve studied the court papers and observed you throughout these sessions. And I think you want them to be over as much as I do. Accordingly, I ideated a plan that could benefit us both”

Azula raised her head from the picture. “You have my attention”

“Just go along with the therapy. By doing so, I will help you outsmart the court psychiatrist”

Azula nodded with a sly smile. So, the bastard thought he could play her, huh? She would beat him at his own game.

“Now, tell me what you see from this photo. I can tell if you’re lying, Azula, so don’t try it” he advertised.

Reluctantly, Azula looked at the picture through half shut eyes.

Peering over the fountain, makeup off, Azula gazed at her own reflection. For so many years after her mother’s banishment, she couldn’t bear her own image at the mirror: it looked so similar to _her_. Thus, Azula always had servants to do her makeup and hair.

But now, after all these years of trials, Azula had seen her mother’s face quite often, so it wasn’t so hard to look at her own face. She thought it would be easier to imitate her mother’s helpless expression; however, her jaws were so clenched that her teeth started to creak. And her face looked so angled that she had to drop it.

“I can’t. She could fool them with her pitiful eyes, but I’ll have to do it differently”. She would have to tell Zhang she couldn’t understand her mother’s face.

_Leave my children alone. It’s me who you want!_

Azula had heard her mother say these words when she was still a child. After a quick explanation from her father, Azula found them to be rather pathetic.

However, when the trial began, Ursa’s face wasn’t hopeless anymore. She was facing fear with unclouded eyes. But Azula couldn’t find the words to express this change.

_I told him: don’t you dare hurt my children. And he did. He must pay for that, Your Honor._

Could love be stronger than fear? Could her mother’s love be true? After all this time, the latest years’ events had started to become clearer. Her mother’s image in a broken mirror; her presence everywhere, torturing her thoughts until it became unbearable. When Azula got interned at a psychiatric clinic, the doctor quickly explained to her that she was hallucinating. Her mother had never been there: in fact, she never came back, until Zuko and Iroh left to search up for her through the whole world. At first, Azula couldn’t believe it. She couldn’t be delusional.

Because of this thought Azula gave up on pills. It was part of the privilege of being a princess: she didn’t have to be forcefully medicated. Thus, she started to see her mother everywhere again. The morning of the day both her doctor and the nurse showed up Ursa’s face, Azula collapsed on the floor. When she woke up, she pounced on the doctor’s head to remove the mask – but there was none. No makeup, no mask – just nothing.

Slowly she gave up to the realization that antipsychotics made the image of her mother disappear. A year passed: she turned fifteen, and she was still at the clinic. That’s when her mother reappeared.

Ursa faced her daughter at the clinic’s hall. Azula met her with shiny eyes.

“Azula, is that you?”

_I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t love you enough. I know there’s no justification for what I did. Would you – could you ever forgive me?_

Azula’s answer was a rampaging breath of fire. After all this time, she could still hear her mother’s cries of burning pain as the flames hit her abdomen.

Ursa didn’t come back, but not because she didn’t want to, but because the doctors told her that Azula wasn’t ready to meet her. Heartbroken, she fled to Ba Sing Se to meet Zuko and Iroh – but not without placing a criminal complaint against the Firelord.

It may have stopped there – but the press found out, and the leaked photos of Ursa’s scarred and burned body went around the world. Suddenly, it became clear the origin of Prince Zuko’s scar, too. The public backlash became unbearable, and the Parliament removed Ozai’s royal duties for as long as the trial lasted. After twenty months of court sessions, the former Firelord was pronounced guilty, and further appeals were declared inadmissible. Everyone testified, and though Ozai had powerful allies into the tribunals, the proofs were crushing - and the public opinion did the rest. It became clear that Ozai was to be imprisoned for at least ten years on, and he would never be Firelord again. The Royal representation went to a distant cousin, at least until Zuko was ready to claim the throne.

Azula went back to the palace for the trials. Zuko didn’t want her to be hospitalized during those times, and against everyone else’s opinion, he held her at expense of a body of chi-blockers and highly skilled guards. He was compassionate enough as to do it – and Azula gazed at his actions with contempt.

But Azula couldn’t find peace of any sort. Her friends had left her after her arousal; her father was in prison. Anyone who she had ever trusted disappeared on thin air. She had to live alone, take her pills and not cause any trouble. It was killing her from inside; but, at least, her hair always looked perfect. During trials, she used her right to remain silent. Sure, her father had done her dirty, but she wasn’t going to betray him. It was like deceiving the only thing she had ever known in her life.

Long ago, she had been her father’s most trusted counselor. She was expected to hold great power, specially after he was named Firelord. During the last years of Azulon’s reign, the world had gone mad after petroleum – and when a high reserve was found at the Earth Kingdom shore, close to the Fire Nation seas, that was it. First, the Fire Nation instigated the inner troubles on the strip, financing rebel armed groups. Then, they claimed their rights over the zone – then the war started. Azula’s cousin, Lu Ten, died in battle: shortly after, Iroh gave up on his birthright, and retired to live a peaceful life in Ba Sing Se. Zuko followed his uncle and made friends with the Avatar. Her mother, Ursa, had faced her trauma and prosecuted Ozai.

And here she was, sitting in front of Zhang, speaking about geopolitics and military with shiny eyes. The therapist listened interestedly; as she finished speaking, her eyes became dark again.

“You said everything in war is a power move. What do you think you father thought when he left you at the hands of Earth Kingdom rebels? Would you have had it?”

Azula raised her head angrily. “I don’t know why you bring this out. They didn’t harm me after all!”

“But he lied to you”

“I fell for his trap. He did what was necessary”

“The leaked telephone conversations showed up that your father knew they were going to give you a vicious death if he didn’t retire his troops”

“I already know that. I don’t care”

“If you don’t care, then why are you crying?”

Sneaking through the antipsychotic effect, a distant echo came back to Azula’s mind.

_I will never let you hurt my children anymore. Look what you did to her. Leave Azula alone!  
_

“Get out! Get out!” she shrieked in distress. Bending a fire blade out of her hand, she prepared to defend herself.

The chi-blocker acted quickly, knocking her out.


	8. Therapy Session - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for strong language, violence and abuse.  
> The italized parts are past moments or reflections that I just wanted to highlight. Enjoy it!

When Azula woke up, she was lying over a clinical stretcher and had an IV catheter inserted on her left arm. The nurse called Zhang once she opened her eyes: it was evident that they were waiting for her to wake up.

Azula hushed bearishly in front of the middle-aged man, wondering how to outsmart him into letting her go home. She was a sharp, smart creature -but the effects of narcotics were barely wearing off, and she felt unmighty, weak. And she hated it.

"You woke up at last. We were so close to make it happen. I was worried about you, Azula"

The girl scoffed. "Liar"

"What would I get from such a lie?"

"You're trying to tame me. I knew it from the beginning. You are a big bogus just like them"

"Who is _them_ , Princess?"

Azula remained silent again. She couldn't infer what he wanted to hear. Did they want her to be sugar-sweet and act like a normal person? She couldn't fake it. She was sure he'd find out.

"I wasn't lying, Princess Azula"

She raised her head, her eyes vague and threatening. "I will order my guards to kill you when it's over" she declared, plainly. "Or - oh, I have a better idea-: I'll tell my brother you were taking advantage of your position over me. Then I won't have to bother about you anymore. How'd you like to be sent into forced conscription and have your ship mysteriously sink on the sea?"

Zhang kept his cool. "You know that wouldn't work"

Azula fixed him with a cold gaze, but said nothing.

"Right now, Princess, your social skills are as bad enough as to scare a turtleduck. Any court therapist could see you haven't progressed at all. If you get rid of me, you'll have to do the process all again"

"Don't think you have a role in it at all. I will run away and make an Empire of my own" She frowned awkwardly, feeling over-conscious. Zhang's poker face was annoying her more than everything. "Don't _laugh_ at me! You know I'm perfectly capable of that"

"I don't laugh at you, Princess Azula. But I know the only thing you want is the Fire Nation throne. Wouldn't you rather take it from the inside?"

Azula clenched her fists. Her heart was beating so strongly that she felt like fainting. She couldn't speak: her eyes were scanning around the room, looking for something to attack him. But she couldn't move. She felt powerless and exposed. Zhang spoke again.

"Then work with me. We'll do it together. I've always wanted to serve the Royal family. That will be my collateral"

Azula howled angrily, throwing a dull, feeble breath of fire.

Two days after the incident, Azula sat gracefully at the therapist's office.

"I've been thinking about it, Zhang" she said, dainty, "and I think we both can benefit from this situation"

"I'm glad you think so" he answered. For a minute, he couldn't move; he was so puzzled by the entire situation. Was the Princess aware of him pivoting her personality traits for her own good? It didn't seem so. He knew her by book and by look: he could tell she was suffering, deep inside. But she just didn't acknowledge it. 'She was taught not to feel", he thought. He decided to approach carefully.

"Princess Azula, I've heard you insulted your mother outside the court when the trials were over"

"I perfectly know what I did, thank you. What does it have to do with you helping me outsmart the judges?" she asked, suspiciously.

Zhang tilted his head to gaze at her. "Did you know your eyes have a way of showing your inner angst, even when your words are the most poised ones?"

Azula felt disarmed. "What?" she squared her shoulders. "You're deceiving me again. Don't think I'll buy it"

"You cannot put on a mask, Azula. People can _tell_ you are working really hard to take control of the situation. I know you've already dealt with that, with no result, when you tried to imitate your mother's helpless face. If you want to convince the court that you're self-sufficient, you have to let me guide you"

"Oh, I know my mother's face, thank you. I know it very well and I can't see why the judges believed her upstaging"

"Your face and hers are pretty similar"

"I know that already, you Obvious Guy"

"Like Zuko and your father are physically similar, too", he declared.

Azula seemed spiteful. "Zuko is an idiot. He is just a weak, whiny bastard who deserves everything that he got. He rightfully won that scar and you know it! It was a fine moment. It served him right"

"Would you have preferred him to be killed by your father long ago?"

"Yes, I would. That way he wouldn't have testified against him, the Firelord would be here and I'd have the rightful throne. I would've loved to see him out of my way, just like my mother did. And I'd be ruling a nation instead of sitting in front of an unnerving moron like you"

Zhang took no offense at all and kept his cool. "How did your father rule, Azula?"

The girl's eyes shone coldly. "He was smart and ruthless. He was harsh, but he rewarded the faithful. He was going to enthr-". She stopped abruptly, panting though her clenched teeth. "No-- he wasn't". She opened her eyes as in realization. It wasn't that she didn't know it already: it was just the feeling of betrayal, raising from deep inside of her from the place where she had buried it. "That _damned_ liar! He outsmarted _me_. Everything I ever did was to please him!"

Now Zhang felt terribly interested. His mind was racing. "And your mother? What did you do to please your mother?"

Azula started to titter half-heartedly. "Oh, you know, my mother thought I was a monster" she said indulgently. "So, to favor her thoughts, I became the best monster she'd ever seen. But she didn't appreciate it. She was so mediocre. She didn't even love me, even when people like her know how to do that easily"

Zhang nodded slowly as in understanding. "Why are you laughing, Azula?"

Azula's smile faded. She started to pout slightly as she said, absent-mindedly: "You know, it's funny, after all"

"What's funny?"

"All this time, she was right". She smiled proudly: "I'm a monster after all".

"I'm sorry to delude your thoughts, but your mother didn't think you were a monster. Neither didn't she love you"

"You double-tongued _shithead_. You know that is not true"

Zhang didn't answer, but he turned on the TV and placed a VHS on the reader. The label said: "Ursa - 1"

Even if Azula's heart was stone cold, her eyes got misty without her noticing.

_My dear Azula, my sweet daughter._

_I'm so sorry. I am recording this with the help of your doctor at the clinic. I don't know if you'll ever see this recording, and I'm doing it in hope you'll be - someday, seeing it. I have nothing to lose now that I know you can't bear to see me again. In case you're wondering, my burn doesn't hurt me anymore - it got healed by the nurses quickly. You haven't scarred Mommy at all._

"I never cared about that" muttered Azula, gazing down and evading the image on screen.

_Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I had taken both you and your brother and escaped from the Fire nation. If I could've saved you from your father's hands, maybe you wouldn't even be here. That's my biggest guilt - not taking you with me when he banished me._

_But he said he was going to kill you both if I tried. And I had nothing to hold on. No one knew me, so no one could've helped me: anyone I could think of was at your father's expense. So - at the cost of my own heart - I left you there. I couldn't bear the fear of having you killed for my fault, so I left and hid as far away as I could. The Air nomads protected me, and no one could ever suspect the monks were hiding the former Firelady on their temples._

_But I must confess, Azula, there hasn't been a day I haven't thought of you. I remember you, running through the gardens, throwing breadcrumbs over the turtleducks' heads. Your laughter filled my ears, and somehow, I felt I could endure anything for you and Zuko's sake. I remember I told you not to hit the animals, and you listened for one day or two - then, your father took you under his arm, and you were torturing them again._

_Your doctor here has told me that you always mention the fact that I say you are a monster. But I know you're not. I know who you are, Azula. And I love you. I miss you so much. I need you to forgive me - I need you to come back to yourself. I can't bear the thought of losing you forever_ -Ursa sobbed, pressing her lips together-. _Mister Satoro, please, turn off the recording._

"What a deceiving little weakling" said Azula, sharply. "She's an idiot, just like my father. A fake tease for the masses"

Zhang peered at her face softly. "If you really think so, then why you are crying?"

Azula raised up from the chair, infuriated. She stormed out of the room.

* * *

_Months later_

She was crying so loudly that she was surprised no one entered the room to see what was happening.

"They're afraid of me" she thought, self-indulgently. But then she remembered: the drugs had decreased her firebending - and the employees were well aware of that. "They're not scared of me at all" she sighed. But she wanted someone there - desperately. She needed to have someone to yell at - maybe even punch something.

For so much time she had been in therapy, but nothing like this. She had learned how to deceive her doctors and psychologists: sometimes, she didn't even need to talk; just remain silent, waiting for them to run out of patience and leave her at peace. Chi-blockers would've knocked her out in a blink, had she tried to do anything; and soon she gave up on any hope to outsmart them, much less manipulate them. They believed her crazy - a monster, a real monster. And maybe they were right.

It was different now - she was bound to go along. It was awful: even though she was treated like a queen here at the palace, the therapist came every day to check on her, and she felt miserable and tired, _terribly_ tired. She was forced to take medication everyday, compelled to look at her mother's face in pictures or recordings; she had to imitate her face as if she were a baby, and not succeeding at all. It was terribly frustrating - especially given the fact that she was alone most of the time.

The times where she had to converse and express her thoughts weren't much better. She would have outbursts, of course, but what was good about it? Her firebending was weakened; she couldn't do anything about the increasing angst inside her body. Her firebending exercises were dull, though she practiced them sacredly every morning; they couldn't erase the heaviness over her chest altogether. Only the hope of being declared self-sufficient by the court and getting freed kept her going to therapy: otherwise, she wouldn't have endured it.

She was seventeen already, but she felt like fifty. Oh, if only she could, how she would show them...! She would throw lightning at anyone who even dared question her might. Everyone would praise her, and she would kill her brother, too - and claim the throne. Her father could rot in prison for all she cared. He was as weak as anyone else.

 _Azula, you're not a monster. "_ My father is a liar". _You don't know how great a mother's love is. "_ He used me as a tool". _I didn't want to hurt you, but I did._

"My father is a fake-ass moron and needs to go down".

The next morning, Ozai's cell got broad open as Azula walked in next to him.

"What a pleasant surprise" her father purred. "To what do I owe this display of loyalty?"

Azula fixed him with a cold, irate glare. "I haven't come to praise your achievements, Father" she mocked. "If I recall, you are imprisoned for your own stupidity and it serves you right"

Ozai looked at her, amused. "What a lovely display, Azula. They have gotten to you, haven't they?"

Azula raised her head our of fierceness. "Gotten to _me?_ No, _I_ have gotten to them! I'm above you, them, everyone else in the world"

Ozai seemed unmoved. "You know, deep inside, you're just like her" he said venomously.

Azula stopped abruptly. "What do you mean?"

"You're just like your mother, Azula. The same look in her eyes... when she won the trial. It's all over your face now"

Azula panted expectantly, as she digested the words. Her heart leaped in realization, but she was done with the talk. "You're just a whiny ass who cannot get over the fact that he lost"

Ozai's vague answer fell flat on an empty room.

"It's over, Zhang. I can win the court!" Azula sounded exultant.

"How do you know it?"

A vicious smile broke on her face. " _He_ told me so".

"Who, Azula?"

"My father!"

Zhang raised from his chair. "You shouldn't have done that, Princess"

"Why? No one else knows her as he does! He told me I had the same face she had when she won the trial"

"You shouldn't have gone to him, Azula. He could've hurt you. I'm not talking as your therapist - I'm talking like as an adult who was made responsible of you"

Azula's smile faded, and her brows knitted. "Why, you think I couldn't take whatever he gave me? You're _so_ wrong. It's Princess Azula you're talking to!"

Zhang went back to the chair. "No, I don't think so" He shook his head, blurred. "Do you recall what was your mother's face back then?"

Azula played with her hair confidently. "Well, it was a relieved one - but also tired"

"Did you feel relief when you faced your father?

Azula looked back at Zhang's eyes through her dark locks of hair, as she slipped her hands through them. "I told him what a low bogus he is. I guess I am relieved"

Zhang smiled ever so slightly. "You know, he probably deserved that"

"I know. I'm way too good for him"

A few weeks after that, Zuko came back in order to apply for university. He was surprised to see that his sister was there at the palace, and most intrigued to see that she seemed as poised and calm as she had been, so long ago, when they were still kids.

At first, he was reluctant to approach to her. They were at opposite sides of the palace, so they barely saw each other - but one evening, he saw her sitting through the gardens, feeding the turtleducks.

It had to be a hallucination: she was feeding them, but not throwing breadcrumbs over their heads. In fact, she seemed absent-minded, letting the little bits fall from her hands.

He stepped softly next to her by the pond. "Azula?"

She jumped slightly. "For Agni's sake, Zuzu, you scared the hell out of me!"

"I'm sorry"

"It doesn't matter now. You've already startled them"

Zuko gazed at the pond awkwardly. "You mean-- the turtleducks?" he inquired breathlessly.

"Yes, dummy, the turtleducks. I want to see if they're no longer afraid of me"

Zuko kneeled next to his sister, keeping an eye at her. "Look at that one. He's coming back. I... I don't think they fear you, Azula"

Suddenly, the girl broke up in odd shrieks of laughter. "Our father was right. I'm just like her"

"What do you mean? When did you see him?"

Azula sat back over the grass. "I went there just to tell him off, and it was a success, Zuzu" she said, with her usual arrogant tone. "But he told me I was just like our mother, and then I realized I must be closer to my freedom right now"

"You mean the court's discharge?"

"What else, Zuzu? I'm eager to be free and go to Ember Island to chill and boss around the beach house"

Zuko smiled a little bit. "You know, you could be there tomorrow if you want to. Just ask the therapist and he'll go there"

"I'm not going to have Zhang psychoanalyzing me there"

"Then wait for your discharge"

The siblings stood quietly over the grass, looking into the vast, starry sky. Neither of them broke the silence: suddenly, the stars danced over them, and time went back peacefully.

"You know, therapy is not that bad" Zuko sounded calm.

Azula shoot him a side-glance. "No, I guess it's not".

* * *

"You've been in treatment for three years and a half, Princess Azula. And after one year under my treatment, I think we can finally start thinking about facing the court psychologists"

Azula nodded lightly. She was feeling rather pretty and loose on her own body. She couldn't recall such a feeling after all her life. Maybe when she was a carefree baby, plucked to her mother's breast.

_You were an army of one girl: Princess Azula, the embodiment of might. No one dared upset you, not even your friends. One day, you were kidnapped by a group of Earth Kingdom rebels when you were assisting your father on a secret mission. They had chi-blockers -and they were reckless. Your father said they could do anything with you: torture you, rape you, starve you to death, but he wouldn't retire his troops from the Earth Kingdom's Yangzu strip._

Azula stared into Zhang's kind face. His eyes were as reddish as a Lychee nut; his hair was jet black, and he had no wrinkles at all. How old was he? Thirty? She hadn't even cared until today. Maybe he had children - or maybe he was gay. A weird feel raised to her stomach. Could it be that she was thankful, after all?

_No one knew exactly how you got away from the rebels: maybe you outsmarted them, maybe they gave up on you. Maybe they downed their guard and you took advantage of the situation. The fact is, you went back to the Fire Nation's royal palace, sneaked into the throne room and started to see hallucinations of your mother. We found you collapsed over the floor, in front of a broken mirror, and you woke up on the hospital. Soon it became clear that you needed psychiatric assistance._

"There's still a lot to unpack, Princess Azula. But I look forward to continue helping you".

"Me too"

_Morons believed you were going to be "mental" for life. But the doctors raised angry voices: if your brother could, there had to be something you could also hold to. Now, with less than half the route already traveled, your family actually believes you are going to become your own person. Reluctant at first, you really believed you could outsmart the forensic psychologists: and by the hand of your personal therapist, you slowly started to realize the truth. When did you face it? It still remains a mystery. There's no specific moment. Some things are clear anyway: you had to face your father, understand your mother and bond to your brother._

Months passed, and Azula started to fondly look up at the therapy sessions. When she turned eighteen, Zhang gave her away a gold bracelet. It had a rose-colored pendant with the shape of a peony.

"This peony" explained Zhang "means you'll always be _brave_ enough as to never give up. You're a pro, Azula. Don't you ever forget it"

Azula looked at the peony, a smile on her face. "Thank you"

* * *

The night ran silently over the Fire Nation capital. Zuko was about to fall asleep, but he couldn't shake the uncanny feeling at the pit of his stomach. He couldn't help the hunch on his heart.

He turned over the bed, anxious.

Suddenly, fast steps came from the corridor. They were light and keen. Zuko sat upright at the edge of the bed.

The door opened up fatefully. Raising from the dark, with a flame on her hand, Azula approached to him, panting nervously.

That was it. He knew it. But - this time, he wouldn't give up without a fight.

"Azula!" he called her out boldly, raising on his feet.

"Zuko" she answered hoarsely.

And she approached to him.

Tears were trimming down her face as she bended off the flame from her hand.

"Azula, what is it? Azula, answer me! You're worrying me!"

"Zu- Zuko" she mumbled. "I... I guess this is it. I'm done already"

"Why on ea... What do you mean? Here, breath with me" he requested, grabbing his sister by the shoulders. Azula drew a deep breath, regaining her composure.

Zuko stared at her quizzically. Azula tilted down her head and spoke gloomily.

"I think I'm in love with my therapist"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Peonies symbolize bravery according to Hanakotoba, the Japanese language of flowers.
> 
> I'm sorry I took off the music for 2 chapters. I deeply believe Azula could have a redemption - after all, she was still a child. And the result of this mini-redemption arc turned out to be unsounded (odd laughs).  
> As for the lenght of this arc, don't worry- I will balance the story. We will have lots of other characters focused-chapters as well, but maybe not as serious (therapy is a hard topic after all).  
> I hope this non-musical take won't bother you. The musical chapters will come back after this one.  
> 


	9. Take My Breath Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title says it all. Really. You'll see for yourself. I apologize in advance, I really do. -devilish laugh-  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv Youtube playlist

The classes began madly fast. Before Katara, Aang or Sokka could tell, they were fully submerged in books, lessons and study groups. Ba Sing Se was still a very strict city: the university reflected the clash between old and new, with messy hairdos popping out over outworn library texts and bright, contrasting outfits at the classroom. And, of course, music. Music sounded everywhere, slipping throughout traditional buildings with the sassiness of an idol. There were romantic, dark and new waves; synth pop, soft and hard rock, punk and ska, even hip-hop and electronic. Weird mixes from underground artists crept from behind closed doors; skinheads and gothics met down the trees to exchange rare vinyls and out-of-law cassettes, and all and each one of the students felt a tacit complicity in hiding rebellious actions from teachers and authorities. Indeed, there was a limit to what was allowed to be hid - but there's so much a student can do while being wrapped up in texts and tests, and the whole university breathed an air of easy balance.

The weekends were much more relaxed: parties were held, and students would go out, roam all around the campus or even fly to other cities, if they were lucky enough as to not live too far from the Earth Kingdom capital. Likewise, Aang would usually pick up his glider and fly over the city, seeing different things and observing the surroundings. Nothing he loved better than descending over the outer ring crop fields and breathe deeply, as the usual smog and hustle from the interior rings faded away.

Katara would escape with him sometimes, if the homework wasn't too heavy. It was an amazing feeling being able to pivot the air with the girl holding strongly to his waist. If he looked down, he could see Katara's long locks flowing through the air, surrounding her pretty face like a mantle. She loved to fly: her skirt would flow around her body, air hitting her face, and a precious evening ahead.

The second weekend after the beginning of classes, they found a small stream, jingling nonchalantly at the end of a wheat field.

"Aang, look! Is deep enough as to bend waves out of it"

Aang jumped next to her, landing over a rock. "It's not artificial" he observed, "it must have been left to irrigate the field naturally"

A watermill rolled at the beginning of the current, next to the wall, where it entered the outer ring from under the stone bricks.

"That's amazing! Aang, we could practice waterbending here!"

A cold wind surprised them. The sun was high on the sky, but autumn and cold winds from the north were starting to blow strongly. They both stared at each other, quizzically.

"Do you mind the cold?" asked Aang.

"I live in the South pole. This is like summer to me. What about you?"

Aang grinned. "I'm an airbender. We use our breath to keep our body temperatures still"

Katara took him by the hand, removing her Huaraches as she did it. "Then, let's go!"

Aang could barely remove his own shoes before they jumped on the water.

Later, as Aang airbended the water out of their damp clothes, they sat at the grass to watch the sunset.

"It always surprises me to see the sun setting" muttered Katara. "Every day is the same at this city... in the South Pole, we can have the sun hiding for months or be in daylight until 11 pm"

"Does it bother you?"

"No, not at all. It's just... different. The sun always tricks us in the Poles. And we have the Southern lights" she sighed, longingly, "they're like home to me, and I miss them so much"

Aang gazed at her sympathetically. "I wish I could see them" he said thoughtfully. He wished to add "...with you" but he couldn't. He didn't want to rush her feelings, so he hushed coyly, letting the phrase stop mid-air.

Anyway, the moment fell magically over them, and he bent over Katara's face to kiss her. He caressed her face as the encounter deepened; then they separated from each other, panting slightly.

"You know" said Katara, teasingly, "if you're an Airbender, and we are just dating each other..."

"Katara..." smiled Aang knowingly, sensing where the girl was pointing towards.

"... does that mean you _take my breath away_?" finished Katara, with a playful smile.

Aang laughed heartedly. "Do I really take your breath away, Katara?"

Katara's face flushed. "I didn't say it that way!"

Aang leaned over her face, a cheeky smile on his face. "Oh, are you sure?" The girl crossed her arms, avoiding his eyes.

"You're not going to stop teasing me, aren't you?". She tried to force a serious face, but she couldn't keep it straight. Her pouting mouth fell flat as Aang started to sing jokingly:

_Turning and returning_

_To some secret place inside_

_Watching in slow motion_

_As you turn around and say_

He took her by the chin, staring gravely at her eyes, as he mockingly added:

_Take my breath_ away

Katara gave a quick laugh. "Oh, do shut up", and she pecked him, shortly.

Aang stared at her disheartened. "You always leave me wanting more" he said, not aware of the double-meaning of his words. Katara perplexedly stared back at him.

"You - are - a-- ugh".

Aang stopped and started to scratch the back of his neck nervously. "I didn't mean it that way! I... just..." he paused to inhale some air "I just wanted to kiss you a little bit more, that's all"

"Oh" was the mild answer. Suddenly, the atmosphere got really awkward.

"Yeah, uh... Are you hungry?"

"Yes, I am"

"How about we go to the cafeteria and have some cake?"

Katara's eyes lighted. "Yes, I'd really like to"

A couple hours later, as they walked back to the campus, they felt much lighter and relaxed. The pastries at the coffee shop had done their effect, and they had started to think longingly about their beds at the dorms.

They entered the campus hand in hand, and Aang escorted Katara to her sorority. While they arrived at the door, the awkwardness of the evening came back, as Katara turned to face him.

Aang felt the urgence to explain himelf again. "Katara, I-". He stopped as the girl stepped closer.

"It doesn't matter, Aang".

He panted nervously as she leaned forward.

"You said you wanted to kiss me _more_ , didn't you?"

She put her arms around his neck as their lips encountered, deep and embracingly, for an eternity of an instant. And, as the kiss deepened and her breath started to be scarce on her throat, Katara held back a knowing giggle.

* * *

"I'm tired of this place, Twinkle-toes"

"Toph! I - I didn't mean to wake you up"

"You expect me not to wake up after you opened the door on a rush like a schoolboy? Bold of you, Aang. I really need to get out and earthbend a whole chunk of dirt. Like a ton" she said, opening the window to spit out. From the outside, someone yelled "Hey! You almost hit me, dickhead!"

"I'm sorry!" shouted Aang to the window. Toph laughed half-heartedly.

"See? If I were downstairs, I could make that ass pay for calling you a dickhead. Not to mention, that nice spittle was MINE, thank you very much, you moron" she added, peering through the window threateningly.

"Toph, he can't hear you, he left"

"He wouldn't have left if I could help it!"

Aang sighed. "Listen Toph, I'd really like you to go outside, but I can't have a girl stepping out of a fraternity"

"Make all the excuses you like, Twinkle-toes. But I'm running out of patience" warned Toph. Aang sighed, taking a sit at the bench.

"I'm so sorry, Toph. I promise I'll think about a way for you to get out as soon as possible and bend a mountain if you want"

Toph gave a bored yawn. "Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, Twinkle-toes. Keep on talking and maybe I'll fall asleep"

A dull silence fell all over the room. Toph broke it as she wrapped herself with the blankets.

"You smell awfully like seaweed, by the way"

The following day, Sokka was sitting at the study room table, with an exercise book and a couple classmates. As he solved the complex equations for tomorrow class, he stifled a yawn. "The university got so monotonous these last few days. I'm bored AF"

Satoru gave him a nerdy look. "We have _just_ started classes, Sokka. I can't believe you're bored already"

"What can I say? I'm a fighter, guys. I was taught to wield a weapon since I was born. I can't be standing still in front of a book five days a week! I need to move my muscles"

Teo raised his head coyly from the book. "Well, I heard there are some nice martial art classes for non benders at the campus. Why don't you sign in?"

"I already did... I'll be attending next week" answered Sokka plainly. "I guess I'm just bored of this city. I never expected it to be so... _dull_ , y'know?"

Satoru adjusted his glasses earnestly. "Well, Ba Sing Se has one of the best universities of the world"

Sokka looked at him uncertainly. Why would he be _so_ serious? "I know, Satoru, I just... See, I'm just adapting, and I think I'd like anything fun to happen, I mean... anything"

Suddenly, as in cue, a loud din came from outside, and the boys fled to the window.

"Oh, fuckery fuck" muttered Sokka, amazed, gaining an amused look from Teo and a grave stare from Satoru. "What is that?"

On the outside, an enormous boulder fled from side to side, eliciting a satisfied smile from its bender. It was a low heighted boy with long hair, a loose sweatshirt and baggy parachute pants. Bending was strictly forbidden inside the campus; at least, the kind of bending that destroyed public mobiliary -like the one at this moment. No one, except Satoru, had ever seen Earthbending: but somehow, he was the most amazed by the display.

"It's awesome!" he muttered breathless. "I've never seen such techniques, not even in my uncle's factory. This is a new sort of earthbending, I'm sure"

"Well, what are you waiting for? Let's get out and see!"

Together, the boys went out of the room and approached to the crowd that was surrounding the earthbender. Seemingly, he didn't care about the attention - or wasn't aware at all about being observed. He was enjoying himself the most by bending rocks and chunks of dirt up in the air, crashing them towards a tree trunk, then reuniting them again. But the most amazing moment was when he took a few nails out of his pocket and started to shape them through the air. The crowd gasped along, and the boy raised his head thoughtfully at the sound, scanning the surroundings with his eyes.

Impulsively, Satoru called him out, reaching out from the crowd. "He- hey, buddy! May I talk to you?"

The boy bended the nails back to their original shape before turning to him. "Oh, hi" he said with a stifled voice.

Satoru smiled coyly, but the boy didn't face him. "Hi, I'm Satoru. I'm sorry for interrupting you, Mr...?"

The boy adjusted his beanie over his eyes. "...Nan-Fang. But you can call me Fang"

"Well, Fang, you have the most amazing talent I've ever seen! Did you just bend _metal?_ Now that's something I'd like to see at my uncle's industries"

"Yeah, thank you, huh... I discovered it a few years ago" he scratched his hair, gazing down.

"But I thought it was a myth!" exclaimed Satoru, breathless. Then, regaining composure, he stiffened himself and said: "Listen, Nan-Fang, I wish I could see more of your amazing talent. You would be doing me a big favor"

Fang tilted his head thoughtfully. "Why, you want to learn metalbending?"

"Wh... No, I'm not a bender. But I work - well, I will, once I get my title-- I will work at the Earthen Fire refinery. And I'd like to see what new techniques the earthbenders there can learn"

Fang considered the thought for a minute. Satoru could barely breath: he had never been so starstruck in his whole life. Then, the boy extended his hand in front of him, a grin on his face. "Deal. When will I see you?"

Satoru considered for a minute. "You can catch me on this same point tomorrow at six"

"Okay" answered Fang. Then, raising his hand awkwardly, he babbled: "I - I have to leave now. Have some homework to do. See ya tomorrow!" And, before Satoru could say 'bye', the boy had stormed out.

Her disguise had been a success: even though she didn't know how a boy actually looked, Aang's loosest pants and a worn-out sweatshirt of hers had concealed all of her feminine forms. And the beanie had hid her eyes and most of the roundness of her face. Self-satisfied, she took an apple out of the platter at the desk and bit it contentedly. She sat at the table, pondering about the recent events. Why had _she_ did it? wondered Toph, as she rested her feet over a pillow. She'd wanted to get out and bend some stuff for fun: but as of Satoru, she could've made an excuse to skip the compromise with him. No - she did have an excuse, actually: a reason to go out and not be locked back again. Aang could bend the shit out of her for all she cared. He wouldn't have her on a dorm all day. He hadn't even arrived yet: he must've been off somewhere with his girlfriend, not minding at all about the girl he had locked up on his own room.

Meanwhile at the School of Engineers yard, as the crowd dispersed, a very angry security guard questioned the few scattered groups that were left, without any clear answer, about who had been the wicked earthbender that had destroyed the freshly planted grass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the tardiness. I was having so much stuff in life and college, too.
> 
> Song in this Chapter: Berlin - Take My Breath Away


	10. Insues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Non musical chapter after a loooong, long time.  
> I missed this so much.  
> I hope it's not bad written.

Yue sat upright at her desk in the classroom. She nibbled her pencil a little, distracted; she wasn't interested at all in the class. She was thinking about tomorrow's party and the people who would be there. Would Sokka attend? That she didn't know; she had barely had time to see him. But - why would she care? He was from literally the other side of the world.

She had known him long ago, when they were younger. He had visited Agna Qel'a with Katara; yet she didn't remember until Katara told her Pakku was her teacher. Indeed, they didn't talk - she was so wrapped up in school and her duties with her people. But, as the memory slowly returned to her mind, she recalled Sokka's cute face as he ravished a pot of turtle-seal stew during a banquet.

She laughed shyly, and suddenly, a voice broke her trance.

"Miss Yue? Miss Yue! Earth to Yue!"

"Oh! Uhm... Present!"

"Your presence is well known already, Miss. I was asking you how Kula described the influence of pressed seaweed powder in children's nutrition"

Yue hesitated a little bit before giving the correct answer. Miss Taool nodded and continued the class. Yue breathed again and, as fast as lightning, her mind went back to ponderating about her clothes for tomorrow's party.

Toph ducked behind a flowerpot as Aang passed in front of her, his texts for the next class in hand. "Phew" she muttered. If he went back to the room, if he had forgot something, her coverage would be lost. Gladly he didn't, and he disappeared on the horizon.

It was the sixth time she went outside to show Satoru the power of metalbending. She still didn't know if the ability could be taught to other earthbenders, as Satoru seemed to wish; but he was nice anyway, and she enjoyed the time she could leave the room and raise chunks of dirt in the air. Even though she didn't need an excuse, it was nice to know someone was waiting for her, eager to see what she could do. Feeling admired and free to roam around was all she ever wanted. Sure, he thought she was a _he_ , but that was the funny part: acting like a tomboy was perfect to her. And she nailed the act.

"Maybe someday he'll find out. But not today". She spit on the pot and directed to the secluded courtyard that Satoru had discovered the previous evening.

The boy was there already, and he called her up as she entered the place. "Hi, Fang! I was wondering if you'd come"

"I'm sorry, I was busy with classes. You know, lots of books"

"Really? What is your career?"

"I--" COUGH! COUGH! Toph started coughing awkwardly, looking for a plausible option as Satoru patted her back. "I study Geophysics"

"Makes sense to me" he answered, rubbing his chin. "An Earthbender who studies Geophysics"

"Yep, that's me" cut Toph, eager to move to less dangerous sands. "You see, I don't know if metalbending can be _taught_ , so I feel like I'm wasting your time"

Satoru smiled slightly. "You know, even if it you don't think you can do something, you mustn’t let that stop you"

Toph smiled coyly. "Do you really think that?"

Satoru answered matter-of-factly. "Yes, I do. After all, you are a _real_ metalbender, aren't you?" Toph nodded and he added, smoothly, "and aren't you blind, too?"

Toph felt as if her true identity was being exposed. She fixed the lock of hair she was using to cover her betraying aquamarine eyes, with a suddenly shy smile.

As weeks passed, Toph started to feel less and less secluded and lonely. She started to look forward into meeting with Satoru: they could talk easily about lots of things, and she didn't feel self-conscious around him. Soon she learned his nerdiness was just superficial, and inside his initial seriousness there was a really sympathetic boy. And his voice was soothing. And he always smelled well.

Satoru didn't mind at all about the weird behavior of his new friend. After all, he was nice, sharp and intelligent. That was the only thing he needed to fully enjoy the company: and he was so talented, things that Satoru admired so much. And so, he found himself preferring Fang's company over the company of his new college friends.

Aang left the classroom quickly. The professor had left them full of readings for the next class, so he went to his dorm as fast as he could to see if he could catch some of the first-year texts at the public rack before his classmates took them all.

The sun was setting earlier every day, and it was almost dark. He almost flew the yard that separated him from the dorms, and as he entered, he picked up the texts from the rack, with a firm promise to share them with his deskmate. He was hasting to share the news with Toph: he was sure she would be happy. He opened the door, unable to contain his eagerness, and he almost yelled: "Toph! Toph! You're going to be free! It took some time, but I convinced that Uncle Iroh I told you about to help u--... Toph?"

As silence fell over the room, Aang’s heart filled with dread. "She escaped" he muttered breathless.

The night felt voraciously over him, as he glazed at the sparkling lights of the city from his window.

He didn't wait. He picked up his glider and started to survey the campus.

Toph opened the door quietly in awareness. "Aang?". Good badgermoles on earth, he wasn't there. She went to the bathroom, took a shower, put on her pajama, and paid attention to the hallway: no one was coming, and everyone was asleep. "Did we really stay until _that_ late?" she wondered. No, it couldn't be: Satoru didn't seem the stay-up late type of guy. It was easier to believe Aang was sneaking of with Katara somewhere, doing Earth knows what. She was patient, however: she blow-dried her hair, and went to repass her earthbending lessons.

But Aang didn't appear. Once she brushed her teeth and went to bed, she remembered that Aang was on exams. There was no way he would be sneaking with Katara, neither studying in a group, since all public spaces at the campus were closed. She had started to feel worried.

Suddenly, an abnormal burst of wind came from the window, and she jumped to close the window: but then she felt Aang, landing over the mid of the room and closing his glider.

"Aang! You got me worried! Where were you?"

Aang shook his head. " _I_ got you worried? No, _you_ got me worried! Where were you? Did you sneak off?"

Toph felt disarmed. "Yes, I did"

"You did! And you know what it would mean to have you discovered?"

"Oh, c'mon, Aang, don't be dramatic. I put on a good disguise and no one suspects"

"Well, somebody could soon or later, Toph! I don't want to be expelled and not being accepted at any university because of this incident"

"Well, you took me at your responsibility, didn't you? No one asked you to help, you nosy airhead. You brought this on yourself!"

Aang stared at her furiously and got quiet. He wasn't going to continue the conversation when it was so heated. He went to the bathroom and closed the door.

The next morning, Aang woke up earlier than he used to. He wanted to speak with Toph, but the girl was fast asleep. He went to the bathroom, got prepared for the class and went out. The day went on slow and heavy, as he studied with a half-empty bowl of rice, then went to the next class almost running.

The last class was so dull yet so important, that Aang felt dizzy with information as he left the classroom. He blinked slowly, immersed on his thoughts, as he walked flimsily the steps to his dorms. Suddenly, a blue parka blocked his view, and a broad smile preceded his.

"Katara!" he cried. Before she knew it, he took her in his arms heartily to raise her in the air and kiss her. When he put her down, he saw her cheeks were darkened and her eyes were shining. "I missed you so much" he muttered, petting her hair and staring into her eyes.

"I missed you too" she answered blushingly, "you were so busy with university, and I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks"

"It was just a weekend, wasn't it?" asked Aang, taking her by the hand and starting to walk. "Do you want to go somewhere?"

"Well, it's late already and mid-week, so... why don't we take a walk around the campus before they send all of us back to our dorms?"

"Seems nice to me" answered Aang, as he pecked Katara's cheek. Suddenly, the girl stopped, looking at a point in the distance. "What is it, sweetie?"

"That... girl" she said, shaking her head incredulously, "she's earthbending"

"What?" Aang's heart leaped in recognition. Standing up in front of a group of boys, Toph was bending enormous rocks and chunks of dirt, putting them back in their place and bending them up again. Her clothes were baggy, and her eyes were covered: however, Aang knew she would be in big trouble if any guard caught her.

"TOPH!" he yelled. "What on _earth_ are you doing?"

The girl dropped the chunk of dirt she was bending. She couldn't escape, she was at bay. Aang stopped in front of her, and the anger from the night before reemerged as the realization fell upon her. Satoru was puzzled, and Sokka and Teo stared at each other thoughtfully. But she couldn't see their faces, after all.

"Oh, so here comes nosy arrowhead! What are you gonna do, lock me up in your room again?!"

The group gasped, and Katara's heart stopped for a minute. She glared at Sokka, and he shook his head unknowingly; then she stared at Aang, and his eyes were helpless. Toph continued, not minding whoever was hearing.

"I'm _so_ tired of you sneaking around with your girlfriend, not minding at all about how I feel being confined in your room. You have the _guts_ of acting mad at me? I should be mad at you! You were hiding me, lying to me and to everyone! Well, you know what? To hell with it! I'm leaving"

Aang could finally speak. "Toph, don't do it! You don't know of any place to go"

"I can do fine on my own, even if I had to live in a cave. Don't act like you care! I told you long ago"

"It was not that easy, Toph! This city is awfully guarded, and I had only one person to look up to!"

"You could've told me!"

"You wouldn't listen! All you ever said was to not excuse myself! So I arranged everything as much as I could, and now I had a full place for you to live"

"Well, you can keep it. I'm done with this" and she went back to the dorms to pick up her stuff.

The group of boys stood in awkward silence, staring at Aang. Katara couldn't speak for a minute; but as the earthbender disappeared at the door, she turned her back and stared at Aang angrily.

"YOU!" she thrust her index into Aang's chest with inhuman rage "you were hiding a girl in your room ALL this time and didn't tell me?"

"Katara, I--"

"And just when I was thinking you were too good to be true. Indeed, you were a liar! Don't try to make up an excuse. It seems it didn't work well with her, either!"

And she stormed off, leaving Aang in the midst of despair and shock. Sokka went after his sister to talk to her, but she waved her hand at him dismissively; then, both siblings disappeared on the horizon.

Satoru was stunned as Teo patted his back. "Hey, mate. You okay?"

"I can't believe it. Why would he-- _she,_ lie?"

"You should ask her first"

Aang muttered slowly: "I was just trying to help her"

"But -- why?"

"She--" started Aang; but suddenly Toph reappeared with her plastic backpack and a knot of clothes in her hand. She was passing in front of them coldly, but Satoru stepped forward, grabbing her arm.

"Fang -- I mean, Toph, please, won't you say goodbye?"

"Goodbye"


	11. Inside Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, 2 chapters in one day! Here is the playlist: this is a musical chapter.  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

The night Azula cried next to her brother, the night she realized the path she had walked with so much effort was twisting like a snail bursting in salt, the cold shower that covered her soul was almost physical, like a cold wind on her back. She went back to bed, feeling feverish for crying too much, and Zuko fixed her a cup of soothing valerian root tea.

She had been feverish so many nights before - anxious, to say the least, of going back to Zhang's office, of staring into his deep amber eyes. Wondering if she could contain the flush on her cheeks and the leap of her heart; sometimes even wondering if he could hear the pounding on her chest. During the session, she could forget the feeling of infatuation that possessed her soul during the day; but as Zhang raised up from the chair, whether to say goodbye or to give her indications, she could feel it again.

She clutched the peony bracelet Zhang had gave her - now not only as an amulet for bravery, but an amulet for love, for real love.

But the night she told her brother she was in love, everything changed. Now the feeling of vague dread that had been there for so much time became real: as she spoke to Zuko, she realized how wrong it was, how wrong and impossible it was.

But now she could love - that was a thing, wasn't it? She thought she wasn't able to love, at least not like everyone thought. Not like Zuko and Mai did a long time ago. She had even thought that she should run away from the idea, or else she'd end up like Ozai and Ursa.

The next morning, Zhang came to visit her. She wasn't a regular patient: she was a princess, and she had to be taken special care of. She waited for him, sitting over her bed with a robe, feeling awkward and misplaced. Zhang entered with a tray of tea.

"I was told you were sick tonight. Are you alright?"

"I am fine, thank you"

Zhang nodded, putting a cup of valerian root tea on her nightstand. "I take it you must have been nervous last night. Do you want to talk about it, Princess Azula?"

The girl hushed for a long time, sullenly staring into her blanket. As the silence became unbearable, she finally opened her mouth. She had to do it: she was certain of it.

"I think I --" she caught herself bearishly, unsure of what to say. As she wasn't the communicative type, she finally said: "I think I love you."

To her surprise -was it a surprise, after all? - Zhang's face stood stoically calm as he waited for her to talk. But Azula didn't want to say anything else, and she gazed into Zhang's amber eyes. They were so common, after all - yet so penetrating, and so full of a reality that, even if shared, could never help being unique and mysterious. She loved him, she really did. She had fallen for a commoner psychologist from a small town, she, the Princess of the Fire Nation.

When Zhang realized that Azula wouldn't talk, he finally spoke, poised and reassuring as always.

"Princess Azula, I am grateful at you for telling me this. But I must clarify from now that such a relationship between us is unhealthy"

"I know that already"

Zhang smiled ever so slightly. "I must explain you that it is not uncommon for patients to fall in love with their therapists, Azula. At some degree, it is even healthy for you to develop feelings of the kind"

Azula's brows knitted. "But you said it is unhealthy for us!". Suddenly she flushed, noticing she was speaking in 'us' terms. Zhang's gaze got suddenly smooth.

"I didn't mean mutual feelings, Princess. I'm talking about your feelings. It would be unethical, unhealthy and _abusive_ from me to take advantage of your feelings"

Azula bit her lip. "But you _do_ care, don't you?"

"I care because you're my patient, Azula. But my feelings for you are, were and will always be uneven with yours"

Azula's eyes darkened: "You despise me. You despise me like all of them. Please, lea--"

Zhang shook his head vehemently. "No, Azula. I have seen you grow, unlearning unhealthy patterns, becoming your own person after being abused and trained to be a soldier kid. I don't despise you. I greatly admire you"

Azula's eyes filled with rage, a watery rage. "You must know -- you OUGHT to know - it was IMPOSSIBLE for me to do this! What have you done, Zhang?! Why did you even help me to it?!"

Zhang titled his head sympathetically, in the way she knew so well and liked so. "You know you have done the impossible, no? Even though you can't see it now, you'll get to live it again if you want to. You are worthy of love, Azula, as much as anyone else"

"I am not going to fall in love ever again. It hurts me so much" she cried again, her voice a strained, angsty whisper of pure wrath and disillusion, "so _fucking_ much!"

Zhang stared at her quietly, as she sobbed groaning in sadness and anger. He didn't want her to be alone at the moment, but he wasn't going to trespass the limits of his professional relationship. Luckily, Zuko knocked at the door. He had been waiting at the other side the whole time. Zhang went to the door and opened it.

"Go on! Leave me alone like everyone else did!" yelled Azula, sitting on the bed and fixing her hair. She drained her eyes and stiffened herself, regaining the old composure of the cold, angsty Princess Azula.

"Will she need an SOS pill?" wondered Zuko, watching her startled. It was still so new for him to see his sister showing emotion, any emotion.

"Let's call the nurse and she'll see". Zhang guided him towards the hallway and spoke in hushed tones, while Azula started to sob quietly again. "Prince Zuko, may I ask you to listen?"

Zuko nodded, puzzled, and Zhang continued.

"Your sister is certainly affected by my rejectment of her feelings towards me, but I know she will overcome to it. Right now, it is not just my denial what makes her cry, but her fear of abandonment pulling through the whole situation"

Zuko turned his gaze to see his sister, her undried hair negligently falling down over the blankets, as she hid her head to cry. He shivered, not out of fear, but out of pure compassion and strangeness. "I understand that. What can I do?"

"I don't think she will hurt herself, but still I would recommend not leaving her alone. She needs to feel validated and contained, and a little help from other relevant people on her life is welcome."

Zuko shook his head, pondering. "I know no one out of my family, and still I don't know if it would help her"

Zhang smiled. "I know you can do it, even on your own, Prince Zuko. But don't cut short the option." And, heading towards the bed, he sat next to Azula. She was still crying quietly, resting her head over her knees. He knew she could hear him, so he didn't insist for her to raise her head. "Princess Azula, I know you're confused and in pain, but I will not stop being your therapist. This situation won't change the fact that I'm your therapist. Together, we will work through this"

The girl didn't bother to answer, but she started to sob more calmly. He patted her back a couple times before heading towards the door. There was Zuko, who was giving the last instructions to an assistant, and a nurse. Zhang waved a polite goodbye and left.

Zuko sat next to his sister, watching her sitting upright for the nurse to evaluate her, stiffening herself as if she were doing him a favor. The sun was setting on the horizon, and he clarified his throat a couple times. She didn't turn her head. His heart gave a leap of faith, for he knew he was doing the right thing. And this knowledge encouraged him to speak.

"I will be here at your side, Azula. Even if you don't want to speak with me, know I'll be right at the next door. You don't have to face this alone"

He expected her to dismiss him, to laugh at him, to discourage his intentions. Instead -wasn't it an amazing thing to do? - she lowered her eyelids and swallowed a bit.

The messenger came back and spoke to Zuko on the ear. The prince nodded.

"And I called Ty Lee to come here" Azula turned her here, taken by cold surprise. "She will be arriving here tomorrow morning"

* * *

_I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation_  
_You're living in the past it's a new generation_  
_A girl can do what she wants to do_

_And that's what I'm gonna do_  
_An' I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation_

Azula was lifting weights, unhearing of the movement outside of her room. She had her headphones on, listening to the best punk rock she had. She was feeling already better, almost new.

Outside the room, her old friend is knocking as hard as she can. Wearing a bright gold spaghetti strap dress, Ty Lee was almost jumping in nervousness. What would she see? The old Azula that had set aside her friends and broken down under the weight of her own perfectionism? No, Zuko had told her she was changing; and Ty Lee wasn't the rancorous type, so she believed it. After all, Azula had never been violent towards her: she monopolized her time when she was around, that was true, but there were moments where genuine pureness had showed up through layers and layers of cold angst. Deprecative, egocentric and coldly poised: that was the Azula she knew and admired, long ago, for the apparent virtues she hid. When Ty Lee learned that Azula had been sent to a psychiatrist, she had gone to the clinic several times, but her friend wasn't receiving any visits. Her situation was delicate, and soon Ty Lee stopped calling to no answers.

But now she wouldn't give up. She knocked at the door again, knowing the next time she would just open.

_I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation_  
_You're living in the past it's a new generation_  
_An' I only feel good when I got no pain_  
_An' that's how I'm gonna stay_  
_An' I don't give a damn_  
_'Bout my bad reputation_

The door burst open, and a slim, light figure entered, running with feathery feet. There was Azula, with a dumbbell on her hand and a portable cassette player on the other. The princess barely had time to remove her headphones, when she felt a pair of arms surrounding her waist in a happy rapture.

"Azula!", Ty Lee exclaimed, with a broad smile.

Awkwardly, Azula patted her back. "Hi, Ty Lee. Long time no see". She left her PCP and the dumbbell on a nearby table and guided her friend towards the end of the room. The girls sat at a nearby set of cushions, and as soon as their butts touched the floor, Ty Lee started to speak, lively as always.

"I missed you so, so much, Zully! They didn't allow me to see you, and I've been waiting to hear from you since then. You had me dead worried all this time! I couldn't stop wondering how you were doing! There's so much I've got to tell you. I'll be staying for as much as I can, then go back to Ember Island"

Azula couldn't contain a smirk at her old friend's enthusiasm. "You know I'm always fine. But -- I missed you, too" she added reluctantly.

Ty Lee's eyes seemed to be about to burst in tears. "Oh, Azula!", and her voice sounded like a plead.

Azula lowered her head and grabbed her friend's hand. "There, don't cry. We are together again, aren't we?"

Ty Lee's face broke on a wide grin. "Yes, we are. And we have a lot of time to make up to"

Adamant at first, Azula smiled, too. Not a big smile, but a smile after all, and Ty Lee's heart leaped in joy at the view. "Let's not wait" said the princess, "tell me how is everything going on in Ember Island. A change of airs could serve me well"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in this chapter: Bad Reputation - Joan Jett and the Blackhearts


	12. It Must Have Been Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Playlist:  
> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

Katara walked next to her brother, way too angry and hurt to say a word. She was walking so fast that Sokka had to almost run to catch her long steps. As he did, he asked her:

"Katara, are you gonna tell me what the hell just happened?"

"Not now, Sokka" scoffed Katara, before turning on a corner and sitting on the secluded garden where Toph and Satoru where meeting the last few weeks. It was empty, and Sokka followed her and took a sit on the bench next to her.

"How are you?"

"Do I look like I'm fine to you?" replied the girl sharply, pressing her lips in an angry pout.

"Hey! It's not like I've seen a lot of you lately! You're always going out with Aang, and now that I see you for more than five minutes it's just because you've dumped him"

"I did not dump him!"

Sokka's confused face was almost comical: "Well, it didn't seem like a friendly quarrel to me"

Katara rested her head on her hands, feeling helpless. "Well, I think I did dump him", and she sighed.

Sokka picked up a nut from the floor and started to peel it, unsure of what to say. "You know, it seems to me that you did the right thing" he said.

"You think?"

"Yeah! I mean... it's not like he was hiding a dog on his room, wasn't him? It's a girl what we're talking about". And a pretty one, but he skipped that part.

"I don't know. I thought I could trust him, I really did. But turns out he's just like every other men"

"Hey! I'm not a womanizer!"

Katara laughed half-heartedly. "You know that's not true. You have a lot of girls rooting for you...! Oh, I shouldn't have said that. Now it'll go all over your dummy head"

Sokka shook his head with a suddenly coy smile. "It may be true, but I don't play in both sides"

Katara left her hands fall from her head to the back of her neck, fixing her hair, and sighed. "It's so warped. Why would the Avatar date me, after all? I'm just a plain water tribe girl who has never left her town until now"

Sokka fixed Katara with a grave stare and put his hands on her shoulders. "Hey, don't say that. Don't you ever think that. Yeah, you're my sister and I may pick on you all day long, but there's no reason for you to believe it. You're Katara, one of the best waterbenders I've ever seen, and soon you'll be the best nurse in the world. You get it?"

Katara nodded with glistening eyes. "Yes, I do", and she hugged her brother tightly. Yet she couldn't help feeling lonely and hurt.

At the other side of the bush, someone was listening very attentively.

* * *

Toph sat next to Satoru under a tree, feeling dizzy and rather violent after the latest events. But Satoru's presence was strong and calming: he somehow managed to set down things by just standing next to her, his face grave and his words well chosen. Slowly, she was starting to feel her mind clearer, and she relaxed a bit.

Perceiving the change in Toph's posture, Satoru started to talk.

"You know, Fan-- I mean, Toph - I still don't know what happened there, but I don't judge you"

The girl turned her face to him. "You don't? But I lied to you! I made you believe I was a boy, I didn't tell you my name, and I said I was a Geophysics student when, in fact, I'm not even at university age!"

Satoru gave a soft giggle, "Me neither"

"You don't?" wondered Toph, breathless.

"Well... no! I'm seventeen. I was passed one year in high school. My teachers told me there was no reason to keep me in school when I already knew everything"

"Oh" was the mild answer. Even more, Toph's brows were knitted, and her head hung down again, as if she were assimilating the truth.

"The thing is, I was being so serious, so smug and self-approving, that I was losing my playfulness. Everyone told me I'd do great things, you know, with the industry and that. But all this brawling made me forget to have fun"

"That seems like half the problem to me"

Satoru laughed smoothly, "Yes, you're right. Is half the problem. The other important half is that I forgot to be myself"

"I understand it so well. It sucks, doesn't it? It happened to me... with my parents"

"I get it you must be running away from them"

"...Yes, I do. And Aang helped me hide, because the police were looking for me"

Satoru smiled, "You see? I'm friends with a runaway. And I must say it: I don't give a damn about it"

"You don't?" wondered Toph, grinning.

"No, I mean... why would I judge? You're a nice person, Toph. I don't care if you are a girl or a boy, you're really cool"

Toph's heart leaped in joy, and she punched Satoru in the arm with a smile. "You're hella cool, too"

They stood for a few minutes in comfortable silence; then, Satoru spoke again. He was serious and hesitant at first, but he finally found his tongue.

"You know, what amazes me a lot... is that, despite I thought you were a boy, I couldn't help..."

"What?" asked the girl, breathless.

Satoru left out a short laugh. "That I really like you, Toph. I never thought I could like a boy. But the real thing is… it didn't matter to me. I just... liked you." And he shook his head, smiling as if he was just noticing the real fun of it all.

Toph pressed her lips, but she couldn't help a smirk. "I like you, too"

Suddenly Satoru got quiet again. "What will happen if you leave, Toph? Will I ever see you again?"

Toph sighed, a new idea forming on her head. "I don't think I'll go that far. I think I'll go and ask Aang about that place he had for me" Satoru breathed in relief, and Toph added: "And I think I'll go and tell his girlfriend this was a big mistake. I never had a thing for Aang. She can have him all for herself for what I care."

Satoru waved goodbye, holding Toph's hand for a little more time than normal, and left Toph to her own thoughts. She didn't even know where she was: all she could hear was a song from a nearby open window, probably one of the dorms.

_It must have been love_   
_But it's over now_   
_It must have been good_   
_But I lost it somehow_

She approached to the place where she knew there was a signpost in Braille for her to read: 'School of Nurses dorms'. There it was, she said. She went through the door, still listening at the music.

 _Make believing_  
 _We're together_  
 _That I'm sheltered_  
 _By your heart_

"Where's Katara?" she asked to a group of girls.

"Who, the Avatar's girlfriend? She's at her room" said a girl with an unusually acute voice.

"Don't be a dip, Nala. Can't you see she _can't see_? There, let us guide you"

Toph squared her shoulders. "Hey, you moron, what's your damage? I'm blind, not a baby. I can go on my own! Just tell me the number of her room and I'll motor over"

The girls stared at each other, feeling intimidated. One of them spoke: she had a sweet voice. "She lives in front of my room, so she must be number 12. But she wasn't fine when I saw her, she wanted to be alone"

"I know that already. But Imma try anyway". And she parted ways.

As Toph approached to the number 12 room, she noticed that the music came from there. She could hear sobbing, too.

_It must have been love_   
_But it's over now_   
_It's where the water flows_   
_It's where the wind blows_

What a drama queen, she thought. But if Aang liked her, then she should clean up part of the mess she had done. Katara probably wouldn't believe him if he told her the truth, so she decided to do it herself. With this in mind, Toph knocked at the door.

Katara's annoyed voice replied from the inside. "Yue, I told you I want to be alone"

"I'm not Yue, I'm Toph. And if you have some good sense on your head, you'll listen to me"

The door burst open and Katara found herself facing the girl from before. She was smaller and sturdier than Katara, and her baggy, dowdy clothes contrasted sharply with the bright colors of her plastic backpack. Katara felt grateful that Toph couldn't see her red and puffy eyes, as she pressed her lips to guide her inwards. This was madly weird. Katara turned off the radio and sat at the bed, feeling awkward.

Toph laid down comfortably at a pouffe and wasted no time. "You made a mistake" Katara was about to interrupt and say 'who, me?', but Toph continued. "I'm nothing but a friend of Aang. Actually, he saved me" Toph could almost feel Katara's perplexing gaze. "I was living on the street. I'm a runaway. He saved me from the cops"

After a few seconds of ponderating, Katara finally talked. "If that's true, then why didn't he tell me?"

"It's _him_ you should ask that, not me. But believe what I say. There's nothing for me in lying about it. I couldn't date Aang, not in a million years" Toph laughed mockingly, almost startling Katara. "He's not my type. You can have him all for yourself if you want to"

Katara almost blushed. "But I don't know if he'll forgive me" she muttered, helpless. "I really messed up"

"You overreacted a little, but he'll be fine. By the way, I should be looking for him. I hope he'll forgive me, too"

Katara gave a quick, unhearthy laugh. "Yeah, you were really, really harsh, Toph"

Toph shrugged, picking on her nail. "However, I'm heading out. Think about it. The dude is head over heels for you, Katara. It's a little bit annoying, but kinda cute."

With that she left, leaving Katara in a more confusing mess than before.

Meanwhile, in the opposite room, Yue sat on her bed, her white hair spreading over the pillow. So unaware of her beauty, her eyes glistening like pearls, Yue was thinking about Sokka.

She liked him, she really did. She just didn't know what to do. All she had ever known was responsibilities and impositions: and the thought was always on her mind like a buzz that she couldn't unhear. The day of the first party, they had danced all night long. He had moved, sometimes funny, sometimes groovy, but always so nice that she couldn't help a smile. They used to see each other a few days after classes, because the Health Sciences campus wasn't too far from the School of Engineers. They had never dated, but they always had tea or sandwiches at The Freshman's Savior, and he always made her laugh. In such moments, she could wonder about how it would be to be another girl, another Yue from another world, where pressure wouldn't tighten over her like an iron fist. There was something in Sokka's easy-going attitude that made her feel new and free. And she wanted to see more of it, to feel more of it - she just didn't know how. And now, she couldn't get enough.

She gazed at the outside, a sad smile playing on her lips. Long ago, her father had told her not to peer through the window, because men would see her from the street and they'd think she was an easy woman. It had scared her so, so much, that she had hid herself under the ledge and crept back to the center of the room. She didn't know what an easy woman was, but in her innocence of a 13-years-old girl, she knew it was a bad thing.

But now she wasn't scared to look through the window. If Sokka saw her, she knew he wouldn't think ill of her. 'No,' she thought, 'I'm not evil for wanting to see the world through a glass panel'. Perhaps she just wanted him to pass under the window and call him to talk and laugh; dreaming out loud about what could and shouldn't be.

But Sokka wasn't there, and no one crossed the veil of her vivid reverie that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in this Chapter: It Must have Been Love - Roxette


	13. Do you really want to hurt me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

Aang couldn't tell if his eyebags were made of sadness or fatigue for studying all night long. Maybe both. All he knew was there wasn't time to cry: he had to pass that test. So, burying his pain under a bunch of texts, he wrapped himself up and skipped that night's sleep. It had been three days since Katara had dumped him, but he couldn't remember how. Even as he left, throwing a blanket over an asleep Toph, he couldn't clarify the echoes of pain resonating on his mind.

He went to the cafeteria to buy a tea energy shot that could wipe out the last trace of tiredness on his body. A song came from the shop owner's radio, bringing back a flinch of pain to his heart.

_Do you really want to hurt me  
Do you really want to make me cry_

'Damn', he almost scowled. To worsen up things, there was a queue: indeed, what else could he expect on a time like this? So he had to dissociate his ears from his heart as he tried to submerge on the soothing atmosphere of the song. He was trying to apply his motto 'if you don't like something, just find the silver lining in it', but it wasn't giving any results this morning.

_Words are few  
I have spoken  
I could waste a thousand years  
Wrapped in sorrow, words are token_

Someone tapped on his shoulder: a girl who was pointing at his shoes, claiming they were untied. Though Aang went down to check and found them tied perfectly, he failed to notice that the girl had just wanted to see if he was the Avatar. Aang grinned at hear half-heartedly and thanked. After a night without a good sleep, he simply wasn't having it.

_Come inside and catch my tears_   
_You've been talking but believe me_   
_If it's true you do not know_   
_This boy loves without a reason_

His turn came and he picked up his shot without worrying about the change. "Keep it", he said before turning his back absentmindedly, eliciting a swoon from the girls at the queue. As he hummed the song softly, he recalled the conversation he had heard from Katara and her brother. Indeed, he didn't mean to listen to them that evening; but he didn't mean to interrupt either, thus he had heard hurtful things. It had never ocurred to Aang that he would ever be seen as a womanizer. In fact, Katara was his first girlfriend, and he had loved her and respected her so much. It pained him deeply to hear she didn't think herself worthy of his attention. To Aang, it had been a miracle that she could ever _see_ him. And now he had lost her.

He didn't blame Toph: he blamed himself for not telling Katara about his friend. They had been two lovebirds chirping about the wind, praising the present and opening their hearts about the past. Therefore, he had assumed his always trusted role of keeping all serious matters for himself.

He entered to the classroom, sat in front of the desk and waited for the teacher to arrive. What a long, long morning was coming forth: he accommodated himself on the seat and drank a long gulp of his energy shot.

"How do I look?"

"Girl, you look amazing on that! Don't bag your face! He's going to love you. Nononono, leave the scrunchie aside! You don't have to look different, just be yourself"

"Thank you, Yue. By the way... are you sure he's going to be there?"

"Yes, I am. My friend told me all first-year students of Anthro are, like, dying by lack of sleep for that exam"

Katara giggled. "Poor things". Then, she got serious: "Aang must be having it really rough"

Yue tilted her head and smiled affectionately. "Well, you too, Katara. I've been picking up your pieces for three days long"

"Well, you aren't going to complain, will you?!", she laughed. "Who's going to help you go on a date with my brother, huh?"

Yue got all flushed. "Oh, hush! You know how I feel about that!"

Katara laughed again. "You know, it's weird to have you and my brother in this situation... but if he's going to go on a date, I'd like it to be with you, Yue"

"Awww, Katara, you're so sweet" smiled Yue, this time less lively.

Ten minutes after that, the girls parted ways in front of the Anthropology classrooms building. Katara sat on a bench next to the entrance, trying to fight her nervousness. She was kicking her feet against the ground as she saw the first finishing students passing in front of her, some of them in couples or even groups, some of them lonely and waiting for their friends to finish. As the groups of finishers got bigger and bigger, Katara started to feel anxious at the absence of Aang.

Then she saw an Air nation guy whom she had seen speaking with Aang sometimes after class. She approached to him, feeling somehow stupid and awkward for being waiting and asking so desperately for a boy.

"Hey," she asked, casually "have you seen Aang?"

"Oh, Aang?" answered the guy, in the lively and carefree way of Air nomads: "He went to the bathroom after he finished the test. But you can catch him on the hall"

"Thank you!" dropped Katara before heading to the hall. The hall, did he say? No, the hallway! She wouldn't risk having him crossing ways. The thought of being trying too much didn't bother her this time. She was burning with anticipation and anxiety.

The hallway was empty, for all the students had flown away from the building after the exams. Some teachers were still talking on the hall, but most of them were buying hot beverages at the tea stand outside.

Katara peered into the bathroom's entrance, feeling slightly self-conscious. "Aang?" No one answered, and she went back. "He isn't there" she sighed.

Suddenly, she felt someone opening the tap and splashing water: as the tap closed, Aang appeared from the door, yawning.

"Nothing like a good nap on the bath after a test" he muttered, rubbing his eyes. Then, with enormous eyes: "Katara!"

"Aang!", the girl's heart leaped, and she panted nervously as she became aware from the situation. "Ho-how are you?"

"I'm... fine, thank you. Where you there for a long time?"

"Just a minute", she lied. "One of your classmates told me you were here". Aang nodded, still blurry, and Katara went back to the matter. "I wanted to talk to you. Well, why don't we go outside?"

They were sitting on a bench under an autumnal tree, leaves falling unstoppably around them. Aang lowered his head to Katara's, so she could feel it easier to speak: "Please, tell me"

"Well... I know I was wrong when I judged you last week. I was so sure you were cheating on me that I couldn't stop to think you could have some explanation for me. Then Toph appeared at my room and told me to listen to her, or else." She quirked a laugh and Aang grinned, numbly. "Now I know you did an amazing thing when you saved her from the streets".

"That's Toph to you." The boy adjusted his hoodie over his shoulders and sighed. "But now, talking seriously... Katara, you had all the reasons to suspect. Even though you rushed to break up with me, I knew I kept the truth from you and made everything so confusing. We weren't talking about our presents... we were still like lovers on a honeymoon"

Katara's heart sank in disapproval. Were they talking in past now?

She bit her lip. "We weren't like lovers at all. We haven't even--". Suddenly she hushed, feeling like talking too much. Aang looked at her, her long curls falling like a cascade over her shoulders and a stern expression darkening her eyes. Was she still hurt?

"I'm so sorry I did you wrong, Katara." And he gazed away.

"Well, I kept important matters from you, too. I haven't even introduced you to my brother"

"I guess he must be a nice man, if he is your brother"

Katara's breathing was heavy, and her heart was beating more off at every second. She placed her hair behind her ear and wondered: "Is it actually over, Aang?"

"If you keep what you said last week, that is". Though his gentle face was serene as always, there was a hint of sadness in his voice, an echo of invitation and a bit of resignation, all mixed.

From this Katara gathered courage to say, shyly: "There's still so much I want to do with you, Aang... There's so much I want to live with you. I don't want this to be the end"

Aang sighed, the weary load from his chest finally moving. "As I do too, Katara. I want to be with you" Katara's eyes finally changed, the blue in them as clear as always. "I promise I won't keep my serious matters in secret again"

"Me neither" answered Katara, taking his hand between hers.

Aang leaned forward and kissed her lovingly in the forehead. "I have to thank Toph for speaking with you", he finally smiled with a sigh.

"Me too" Katara giggled softly, and pressed her lips to Aang's, muttering: "I feel better now"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song in this chapter: Do you really want to hurt me - Culture Club


	14. Lilies of the Valley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, so, this is a Hanakotoba chapter! I can never get enough of the language of flowers. There's also music, so don't forget the playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

_Meanwhile, Fire Nation Capital University_

Zuko came out from the SEP office with a bunch of papers in hand. Even a prince had to carry on important documents when applying for an exchange: but he was sure he could do it. If everything went well, he would be in Ba Sing Se the next semester. The Earth Kingdom... He wondered how he would be received: some people there had already raised concerned voices about the Fire Nation militarization at the Yangzu strip. And it was of public knowledge that the Fire Lord and Princess Azula had been there to lead the troops, especially among Political Sciences students. But he would face it. He wanted to be the best ruler the Fire Nation could have.

More than anything, he wanted to get out from the Fire Nation for a while. Unlike Azula, he couldn't regain his strength there... not after seeing Mai at Ember Island. Somehow, he had lost her there more than anywhere. And it broke him so much to think he was responsible somehow. He had pushed her apart when his therapy got hard, when all of his relationships were under scrutiny and he didn't know where to look up to. But he couldn't break up with her- he wasn't sure if Mai fell into the square of his toxic relationships. Yet, as he became more and more quiet and angsty again, she couldn't bear it anymore. And he couldn't blame her. Even Zuko couldn't put up with himself during those hard times. Zuko knew he had hurt Mai, she who had always been next to him to face anything that came.

Now, everything was running softer, but it never occurred to Zuko that he could go back to Mai. He used to think about her usually and fondly, especially at nights, when stars fell so slow over a warm Fire Nation. At those times he could see, almost feel, how she wasn't there as always. He could divagate, sometimes just with his mind, fewer times with a feather-like weight over his heart, about Mai's demeanor, the still fieriness of her eyes and the lukewarm feel of her hands over his skin. How she would roam around his room, arranging flowers and talking about books, with the vague smile that only appeared on those rare times she felt happy and safe. He had wanted to protect that smile - but he couldn't even protect his own. And now, when he saw her on Ember Island, he felt helpless, especially after Azula told him, frank as she was, that it had happened _due_ to their breakup. Not just after, not because of someone else, but because of Zuko and Mai's breakup.

Then, for the first time, it occurred to him how nice it would be to have her again, resting his head on her lap. Then, as alcohol subdued his mind, he would even linger -much to his shame- about her long hair spreading lusciously around her body, the jet-black locks dividing again and again everywhere up to infinity through half-shut eyes... No, it wasn't a fantasy coming from a lusty arousal: it was his long-treasured memories, coming back again and again from the disinhibition of alcohol and the vision of Mai's crimson red qipao.

But he was an adult, and he would learn to live with it. He had so many things to hold to, to dream about. He had so much to learn and live. It wasn't even love what he was dreaming of: besides Mai, he didn't even care for that part. He could love or not love; he could always have tons of other things to worry. Like therapy. Like Azula. Like his mother, and his uncle. His people. And of making things right.

He climbed on the car, turned on the radio, and a song came like a destiny signal to him.

 _Welcome to your life_  
 _There's no turning back_  
 _Even while we sleep_  
 _We will find you_ _  
Acting on your best behavior  
Turn your back on mother nature_

He sang the chorus the best he could with his high tenor voice, feeling the moment at its best.

_Everybody wants to rule the world_

He remembered himself a couple years ago. "I am never happy". What would that Zuko think about his adult self? Would he be ashamed? Laugh awkwardly? Or could he be proud? He doubted it, but the thought didn't hurt. He had reconciled himself with teen Zuko. He could be angsty and socially awkward, even nowadays, but so many of his questions had a reason to be answered. And he wanted to make sure they were answered.

 _It's my own design_  
 _It's my own remorse_  
 _Help me to decide_  
 _Help me make the most_  
 _Of freedom and of pleasure_ _  
Nothing ever lasts forever  
Everybody wants to rule the world_

Images from his past came to his mind, but they weren't unbearable anymore. Her mother's body covered with burns and scars; Azula's face trimming with tears; Uncle Iroh's loving expression while preparing a cup of tea; Aang's hurt face when Zuko insulted him the day they met. And -with a deep longing feel- the secret shine of Mai's eyes the moment they first had sex, and -even more precious to him- the encounter of their souls the following times.

_There's a room where the light won't find you_   
_Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down_   
_When they do, I'll be right behind you_   
_So glad we've almost made it_   
_So sad they had to fade it_   
_Everybody wants to rule the world_

He exhaled, letting go the nostalgia, and sang along with the song. He drove to the palace (the university wasn't too far from it) but he decided to stop at a flower shop. He wanted to bring a custom bouquet for his mother. And it was there where he saw her.

Mai was dressed in a neat uniform, her long, silky hair smoothed back. He glared at the shop's signboard: his mind had betrayed him. Unconsciously -or maybe not- he had drove up to Aunt Mura's shop. But he could have ever known Mai'd be there: in his mind, she was still at Ember Island living her best life.

Or maybe he just wanted to see something from her world, anything, in a place that resonated like his memories with Mai but had barely anything from her.

"... Mai." He smiled softly, remembering how he'd learn to keep his anxiety in such situations.

"Hello, Prince Zuko", she greeted politely. "I cannot say I'm surprised"

Zuko let out a laugh. "I should be surprised. I thought you were still at Ember Island"

"Oh, I left there a couple weeks ago, in October" she said, as if it were a mere fling. "But I don't think I'll be staying here for too long. Like I told you in summer, I want to leave the Fire Nation for a while"

Zuko drew a long breath. Could it be that Mai wanted to leave for the same reason than he? As she did not receive a response, Mai spoke again. "Well... How can I help you?"

Zuko explained his request to Mai. He wanted a bouquet for his mother, and he wanted it to show her how much he appreciated her strength, and how glad he was that things were going better now. After listening to him attentively, Mai approached to a pot in the corner. It was full of pink flowers with five petals, growing directly from the branch. "These are cherry blossom flowers. We bring them from Southern Earth Kingdom this time of the year. They're a token for strength"

Zuko nodded in agreement, looking at the counters full of flowers. He picked up a few purple ones and asked: "What do they mean?"

Mai answered from the counter where she was tending to the Sakura branches, barely raising her eyes, with the expertise of a real shopkeeper. "I don't think they will work for this case. They're primroses, and they symbolize long-lasting love and desire"

"I'll bring a few however" he answered, putting them on the counter. Mai quirked an eyebrow, looking at them, and Zuko almost laughed. "...Separately."

Mai finished with the Sakura flowers and glared at Zuko. "What else?"

"Do you have something to symbolize gentleness?"

"In fact, I do. But I hope the result is not too tacky". She picked up a pair of white hibiscus flowers and laid them next to the bouquet. The couple leaned back to admire the result from afar. "Oddly enough, I think they work perfectly"

"Yes, you're really talented" he dropped as spontaneously as he could. Since when he was a good flirter? However, he detected a faint of a smile over Mai's face.

"Do you want some bamboo grass for the good luck?"

"Yeah, and for the green too." Mai arranged the flowers between the green, and the result was really beautiful. But it still lacked something. He turned to face Mai and said: "Now this is the part where I tell you to add something of your invention"

Mai startled ever so slightly, but she took the cue. Zuko knew how much she liked to be challenged, and he felt oddly powerful for eliciting such a response from her again. He tried to not look too much self-satisfied, as Mai came back from a pot full of white, small bellflowers. She showed him a few and a sweet fragrance came from them.

"These are lilies of the valley". The girl held Zuko's gaze as she explained purposefully: "They symbolize the return of happiness"

A warm knot formed at the pit of his stomach. It was so thoughtful of Mai to keep in mind how hard times had been for Ursa, and to express it through flowers. Somehow, he couldn't speak; he missed her so much. "That's so meaningful" he almost whispered. "I-- Thank you, Mai"

She smiled, and for the first time Zuko felt at home again. As he paid silently, Mai's long hands almost danced over the counter, wrapping the flowers in crepe paper and tying them with a silk lace. Zuko picked up the bouquet and started to leave.

"Zuko!"

He turned knowingly, almost amused. "Huh?"

"Your primroses."

He smiled as he dropped as casually as he could: "You can keep them. I bet they look fine on you"

And, without waiting for a response, he left, almost running.

There is a small house in a royal servants’ condominium that runs adjacent to the Fire Nation palace. In fact, it's not bigger than a bungalow, but far more accommodated, since Fire Prince Zuko and his mother Lady Ursa were currently living there. Now, there was also Princess Azula living there, since she came back from Ember Island.

No more than a few servants knew they were living there, since they were laying low at the moment. Lord Zinan was surrogate Firelord, but his power was far from being stablished: he had to pay respects to the Royal heirs wherever he found them, and any decisions, let alone decrees, had to be consulted with the Council and the Parliament. Even as a parliamentary monarchy, the Fire Nation held the Firelord in the highest position, and Zinan was just a temporary relief until Zuko could claim his birthright. It was expected to be done once he finished his studies. Times were hard, and Zuko sometimes didn't know if he could make it. After Ozai's trials went public, the institution of monarchy was severely damaged, and some people didn't believe the heirs were in position to represent the whole nation. Even though the press had done its best efforts to enhance the central power as a unity, people were waiting for a demonstration of real power and not mere words. Small acts like visiting hospitals, signing up official statements and having a flawless behavior, were still not enough to keep the Fire citizens on their toes.

But this wasn't on Zuko's mind when he arrived home. It was enough to him to know his mother was at the other side of the door... and Azula waiting for him to get out of the car.

"I was so bored of waiting for you to arrive" she ejected once he opened the door. "You certainly took your time"

Zuko knew she was waiting for a reason, and he hoped it was a good one. "I was picking up... this." And he raised the bouquet for Azula to see it.

His sister raised her eyebrows. "What a surprise. I didn't know you had it on you, Zuko", she claimed mockingly. "Who are you dating now?"

"It's not for a date. It's for Mom"

Suddenly Azula knit her brows. "Where did you get them?" she dropped.

Zuko jumped and Azula knew she'd caught him. "Oh-- uhmmm, I went to Aunt Mura's place" he flushed, and Azula laughed at him. Her brother certainly didn't know how to lie.

"So you saw her!" she remarked victoriously, "That's why you are all flimsy about it!"

Zuko stiffened his face and answered seriously: "I don't know who you're talking about"

Azula clapped ironically and gave him an accusing look. "I'd believe your act if you weren't as red as a lily" she added dryly as she closed the car's door. "How is Mai?" she asked carelessly.

Zuko sighed, giving up on the act. "She was fine"

"And she didn't send me anything? What a shame" she remarked disappointingly, but Zuko knew it was an act. They climbed the steps, feeling both secretly warm and safe. "And you didn't bring something for me neither"

"Azula, I know you hate flowers"

The girl glared briefly at her peony bracelet. "Not all of them"

"You know I'd have brought something for you if I knew" he said, as he closed the door and laid his bag on a chair. "Now tell me why you were waiting for me"

Azula gave him an innocent look as if she didn't know why he was asking.

Zuko knit his eyebrows. "Azula, where's Mom?"

"Oh, she's at her room" she answered, as she laid on the sofa.

Zuko got up from the armchair. "Great. Then I'll wait for her in the backyard"

Azula answered quickly: "No, just wait here with me. Have you eaten something?"

Zuko shook his head. They sat on the sofa, feeling suddenly awkward. A voice came from the back room: Ursa's sweet lull calling in a loud "Children! Lunch is ready!"

The moment they arrived at the backyard, Zuko knew why Azula was waiting for him. Lunch was served on the garden table, and it was so generous and varied that it was obvious that someone had laid it with a purpose. There was roasted komodo chicken, as gold as a crown; meat dumplings and ash banana bread, bowls of rice all mixed with peanuts and spices, fried fish all sprinkled with chili, and sauces of all kinds distributed between watermelon juice pitchers and a bottle of wine.

Zuko picked up his jaw to say: "Are we... receiving the President or something?"

Azula laughed heartedly, and just then Ursa appeared from the corner. She was dressed up in a long, light dress that flew with the wind like a dandelion, and she had a smile on her face.

"I wanted to give you both a surprise since Azula arrived last night. What do you think?"

Since Zuko was still panting, Azula spoke, so gentle that her brother almost couldn't recognize her. "I told you it was a good idea. And it smells nice, too"

Zuko regained his breath and answered: "Yeah, Mom, this looks amazing. Look, I brought you something too" And he drew the bouquet from his back.

Ursa's eyes filled with tenderness. "Oh, Zuko, this is lovely! And it smells amazing! Now I see exactly what the table was lacking" And she arranged the bouquet on a glass jar. "Did you study the language of flowers for this bouquet with Mai, Zuko?" she wondered innocently, petting the Sakura flowers with a light hand. Azula suppressed a laugh as Zuko shook his head coyly.

They sat at the table and ate together, talking as if time had stopped just for them, silently aware of the fragility of a moment that stood as precious and ephemeral as a Sakura flower. And just for that reason, they also knew, deep inside, that even though they were far from perfect, even though there was still so much to do and to learn, this moment -and their remaking family- was everything that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in this chapter:  
> Everybody Wants to Rule the World - Tears for Fears


	15. The Real Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LEMON ALERT! This is the chapter that made me change this fanfic from Mature to Explicit. I remember you that Lemon was advertised from the beginning, so I hope you enjoy it.  
> Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmT_BhGygvQCOGEiC8g_sL3HB93ORqJIv

It was a warm morning in the Fire Nation capital. Sitting in front of her mirror, Azula worked with her hair, her peony bracelet swinging against her arm negligently. She was going to see Zhang and she wanted to rely on her looks for strength. It was always easier to look polished and neat so that her appearance could help with her poised demeanor.

Time and distance had passed through her, making their purifying effect on her soul. She was sure of what she was going to do. She had to tell Zhang: she needed his words, his response. She picked up the box with a ring inside and sighed.

Now she was ready.

As she arrived at the office she stopped in front of a show window, staring at herself. "Do I look like it?" she wondered for a second. But it didn't matter. She felt like it. She came into Zhang's office, announcing her presence to the secretary.

"Please, come, princess Azula" called Zhang from the door.

The girl entered the room, gathering her enormous might to do what she was going to do. She reminded herself that she was the best, the strongest, the most intelligent, and smiled ever so slightly.

Zhang stared at her, feeling her lively presence odd, to say the least. Azula stood in front of her therapist, feeling clearer than ever.

They saluted each other and Zhang started to look at Azula puzzlingly after asking her how she was doing.

"Zhang, you know how I told you that I loved you before I headed to Ember Island?"

Zhang nodded. "I was hoping to talk about it. How are you feeling?"

Azula clenched the ring inside her pocket and spoke, her voice as clear as crystal. She was going to say the most important words of her short life.

"Actually, Zhang," she stopped to push her hair back, "I was confused. I didn't love you. You nurtured me and I mistook it for love"

Zhang watched her carefully, listening attentively to her words, and let her speak.

"But now I know love is far too much more than that. I don't think I could love you, Zhang... because I can't love any man"

"Tell me more about it, Princess." Zhang started to take up notes.

"It's not that complex, Zhang. I've been thinking about it... and I came up with just one thing: I like _girls_. Like a boy falls in love with a girl... except that I'm not a boy. I'm Princess Azula." She remarked self-deprecatingly: "A princess who likes girls."

Zhang took his time to speak carefully. "If that's what you feel, Azula, then there's absolutely nothing wrong about it." Azula raised her head to stare at him, thoughts passing on her mind in a rush. "You should explore it and let it find its path"

Azula let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Maybe because she was so unbelieving of this part of herself, at least until now, when words made the facts true to her eyes.

She took the ring out of her pocket and showed it to Zhang. "You see this ring? It was given to me by my friend Ty Lee when we were on Ember Island. She said it was a friendship ring. But when she showed it to me, I suddenly came to the realization that I feel more than friendship for her. Now that I think about it, I've never felt this way about guys, no matter how hard I tried." She picked at her nails, trying to look uninterested. "But now the ring is a problem"

"What's the problem with the ring, Princess?"

Azula scoffed. "The problem? The problem is really clear to me, Zhang. She's not a friend to me. She's so much more than that"

Zhang hummed, not minding at all about Azula's harshness. "You can work through this, Princess Azula. May I give you a tip?" Azula nodded, her arms still crossed.

Outside the window, a pink bird started to sing.

Zuko entered reluctantly to the Royal Palace after his sister. "Tell me one more time, why are we doing this?"

Azula turned to fix him with a stern look. "Because Zhang told me it would be good for me to hang out with friends. And our house is way too small to receive Mai and also Ty lee. She counts for two."

"Well, I still don't know if it's good for me to come--"

"Don't be a fool, Zuzu. You know you're dying to see Mai again"

"I am not interested at all..."

Azula laughed mockingly. "Don't be coy at me, Zuzu. You are all flushed whenever she comes home"

Zuko sighed. "I can't keep anything from you"

"Well, I'm your sister, aren't I?" she answered mildly, as she was concentrated in checking out if the champagne fountain worked.

"Whoever saw you would think you're preparing the reception for a marriage"

Azula stopped, glaring at the ring on her left hand. "I'm certainly _not_ doing that. So, Zuzu? Why don't you go for a bath or something? The girls will be arriving soon"

"Why would I take a bath? I already took a sho--"

"For Fire's sake, Zuko, please go! I need to check on something"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry..."

When Zuko left, Azula took a minute to check in the illumination, verifying that it would highlight her amber eyes. With a good amount of warmth, light could make her eyes look like a fire. She felt so self-conscious doing this that she couldn't bear to have anyone near. She had never felt this way before - at least not consciously. She sat on a chair, regaining her usual cool and poised demeanor.

A servant appeared at the door and curtsied. "Princess, your friends have arrived"

"Let them come" she answered, fixing her hair and brushing her brows with her fingers. As she waited for her friends to arrive, she approached to the mirror, examining her makeup.

Some time passed before a light figure appeared jumping from the hallway: Ty Lee ran to hug her. "Azula!" she yelled, beaming. "I'm so glad to see you, girlfriend"

"Me too, Ty Lee" answered Azula, feeling the taste of the last word way too much time than she ought.

Mai stared at Azula's black flannel shirt with a smirk. "Your shirt makes me wanna puke" she declared viciously.

"Oh, does it?" answered Azula, with a cruel smile. "And I think I'm just going to rip your clothes to shreds for saying that". Mai smiled devilishly, and both girls burst up laughing.

"Well, Zuko might like that!" added Ty Lee with a giggle, joining their laughs.

They didn't notice Zuko standing awkwardly at the door.

"Huh... I.. Hello" he panted nervously, noticing that Mai was wearing the red qipao again.

"Zuko!" Azula turned, still smiling. "How long have you been there?"

"I have just arrived" he answered, but his bright eyes suggested otherwise.

"Why don't we sit at the table and play Mah-jong?" proposed Azula, guiding them into the room.

They started to drink really soon, enjoying the watermelon cocktails that the bartender was sending them from the kitchen. As they slowly started to get drunk, Ty Lee suggested playing strip pai-sho. It was a bad move: Azula knew that she and Zuko never lost, so Ty Lee and Mai would pay the price.

Ty Lee was the first to lose: she eagerly removed her necklace. Soon the necklace was followed by her earrings, her scrunchie, and her pantyhose: she was starting to look really flushed after removing her wine-colored shirt.

Mai yielded after seeing her stockings on the pile.

"I'm not giving you the satisfaction to keep your clothes on while I undress" she claimed, crossing her arms. "And I don't know why I'm following this stupid idea. Who was it?"

"Me" answered Ty Lee, slightly ashamed. "But I don't think I can play anymore" she added with her cheeks flushed and lowering her gaze: "I don't want to end up naked in front of Zuko"

Azula took the opportunity, jumping like a cat over a mouse. "Then Zuko shouldn't stay and make Ty Lee uncomfortable. After all, he and Mai are not stripping at all. Why don't you go and search for a good film on the home theater? Come on, we'll head there really soon." She didn't want to see Ty Lee naked forcefully (wouldn't it be a common thing to do, coming from her?), she just wanted to be alone with her for a while.

Zuko and Mai glanced at each other, feeling awkward. Internally, Zuko didn't know if he should kill his sister or thank her. Maybe both.

"Let's go," he said, avoiding Mai's eyes. The reluctant couple headed to the home theater, leaving Azula and Ty Lee alone.

"Are you uncomfortable, Ty Lee?" wondered Azula, reaching for the clothes pile and handing her her shirt. The vision of her friend's white bra was starting to almost flash in her eyes.

"Nah, I'm okay now" added Ty Lee carelessly and shoving the shirt aside. "In fact, I could be naked right now, for all I trust you"

Azula's face fell. "You _do_ trust me, don't you?" she said in a low tone, then wondered: "What about the time we got separated?"

Ty Lee reached for her glass. "You mean when you went to the Yangzu strip with your father? You never told us why you did it, but I was so scared. I knew you were heading for a breakdown. Actually, I feel it is my fault for not preventing it". Her eyes wandered away.

Azula shook her head graciously. "Don't be a fool, Ty Lee. I got what was coming to me, but I took no harm in doing it. But I switched destiny's hand and here I am." She laughed, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "In fact, I'm glad you were not there with me", she lowered her voice to an intimate tone.

Ty Lee seemed almost puzzled about her friend's coy behavior. She laid a hand on Azula's arm.

"Why, Zully? You know you can tell me everything"

Azula took a long breath, then spoke.

"Because I might've hurt you in the meantime"

Ty Lee's face fell. "Oh, Azula. You could never hurt me." And, placing a hand on her back, she approached her face to Azula's.

Azula could feel her friend's breath on her cheek as they rested each other's face on their shoulders, but somehow, she couldn't feel happy for the friendly hug.

 _You're the biggest fool, Azula! You should've kissed her! What's going on with you?_ she thought angrily to herself. Ty Lee rubbed her back soothingly.

"Come on, Azula. It didn't happen after all. We'll be fine. You're my BFF, y'know? C'mon, it's not like you to sink down for something so small"

Laying her head against Ty Lee's shoulder, Azula clenched her teeth.

Meanwhile, on the home theater, Mai and Zuko waited, their backs turned at each other while the screen stared blankly at them, empty of image. Somehow, they still couldn't believe the fact that they were _so_ close, after being even closer not too long ago, and then all distant at each other.

"I don't think they're coming" claimed Mai blandly.

"...Why? They always come here to watch movies... of Azula's liking, of course"

"I don't think it'll be the same this time. In fact, I don't think it'll be the same ever again"

Zuko stared at Mai, turning to her for the first time in a while. "You sound much more pessimistic than usually"

Mai glanced back at him, then started to slowly stand up. "You don't really understand what's going on, don't you?"

Zuko knit his brows reflectively. "If I did, we wouldn't be talking right now"

Mai sighed. "Azula hasn't told you, but I don't think she would say it to anyone in the world."

Zuko scratched his head."Azula is hard to read all the time", he said measuringly. "Sometimes she gives too much information, others she refuses to speak about something as impersonal as climate"

Mai sat back slowly again. "It took time for me to notice. Maybe she was always like this. But when we were on Ember Island, I noticed she didn't like boys."

Zuko quirked an eyebrow. "Azula doesn't like _anything_ at all"

Mai scoffed. "You boys are always so narrow-minded. Azula is much more complex than that." As Zuko seemed still puzzled, Mai sighed again. "I mean she's in love with Ty Lee," she said as if it were an obvious thing.

Zuko felt so shocked that he couldn't speak. For a few seconds, he couldn't collect himself.

Mai stood up tiredly again and spoke from the door. "Don't you think I was trying to tattletale or something. I just said it because I think she's gonna need you more than ever". And she disappeared in the hallway, heading to her guest room.

When the four of them had already retired to their rooms, only one of them was sleeping soundly, and that one was Ty Lee.

The other three laid over their backs, with their eyes fixed on the carved wood ceiling. Zuko was still thinking about Mai's words, and how they intertwined with whatever was left of all their years of friendship. He had thought that maybe Azula could go back to her friends and keep him out of the group, but given the fact that his sister was in love with Ty Lee -not even a faint of the idea of mistrusting Mai's judgment came to his mind- it was going to be impossible.

Just as it was for him now.

He was thinking about the girl at the other side of the hallway, her quiet presence, and the quiet beast that rested inside her chest. Could she be waiting for him to appear and eat his heart out? Her bloody red qipao suggested a universe of feelings that made him dread even opening his eyes right now. But maybe she wasn't wearing it right now.

He was so shameful that the thought of knocking at her door seemed impossible. But there was still some alcohol on his veins, and before he knew it, his hand was on his door handle. Now there was no turning back.

Meanwhile, Azula stood on her bed with a hand flat above her stomach, as she waited for the sleep inducer to hit her.

Mai sat upright at the bed when she felt the knocking. "Who is it?"

On the other side of the door, Zuko's heart leaped. At the sound of Mai's voice, his impulse took the opposite direction, burning him with the need to run away.

But he stiffened himself and answered: "It's me, Zuko. I want to talk to you about something"

For a minute he could hear the rustling of clothes inside the room and the feathery sound of Mai's steps. If she didn't want to see him, he thought, she would send him back to bed. Then he would leave her alone forever and forget everything: the sound of her voice, the coolness of her hands, the luscious waterfall of her hair. If not, then...

"Come in" was the brief answer.

He was trembling when he entered, but thank the odds the lights were still off. He could do some quick and profound breaths to calm himself before Mai turned on the lights and faced him, sitting on the couch. A long, black robe covered her from shoulders to ankles.

"I didn't come to talk about Azula" was all he could eject from between the rapid beats of his heart.

Mai quirked an eyebrow.

"I came to talk about _us_ "

"I'm so interested right now."

Zuko's spirits almost fell, but he knew that if Mai weren't interested, she wouldn't have opened the door. He started to speak incoherently.

"This is so hard for me, but I'll do it. I _have_ to do it. Mai, I mean that--"

"Come on, Zuko, get to the point"

Zuko glanced directly at her. "I mean that I haven't forgotten you, Mai. And I think you have noticed it too"

Mai's eyes stared back at him with coldness. "That's an understatement, Zuko. You're so evident that if I left you, you would be wavering your tail at me like a puppy"

Zuko almost laughed, but he couldn't help the unrhythmical beating of his heart. "I... I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

Mai avoided is gaze, then spoke slowly. "In fact, it didn't. Do you know what has made me uncomfortable? You, coming to my room in the middle of the night flushed like an apple, and claiming to be still interested in me. What did you expect, Zuko?" she involuntarily raised her voice a little bit, then lowered it again to her usual tone of boredom: "Did you want me to say yes and use me again?"

Zuko's face fell and his heartbeat sank down. "I have never used you, Mai. I cared about you"

Mai rolled her eyes, too much purposefully as to be her usual disinterested self. "I think that you made it clear when you tossed me aside on your worst moment, like some kind of toilet paper"

Zuko raised his head and stared into her eyes deeply. "I'm so sorry, Mai"

"Yeah, about damn time."

They sat next to each other, looking at the floor. The silence ran between them, half awkward and half comfortable, perhaps due to the fact that they knew each other _so_ well.

"Even though I'm not the same that I was when I pulled you apart... I understand if you don't want me, Mai. Just say the word and I'll leave you to yourself"

Mai glanced at him. She was sitting with her arms crossed, and Zuko's head hanged loosely over his chest, so she couldn't see his scar from there. Her brows furrowed just by the look of him.

"Oh, yeah? Haven't you done that already?" She was still angry and couldn't say the words. _Yes, Zuko, leave me alone for fucking once_. Why was it so hard? "If you loved me, why didn't you say it at least one last time before disappearing into thin air?"

Zuko turned to face her and it surprised Mai to see that his face wasn't angsty, shameful, or pleading. In fact, it looked almost calm. He had changed so much. Was he still hers? Was she still his, after all this time of running from one guy to another, still too afraid to commit?

"I was selfish and unreasonable," he remarked carefully. "I think that I still am. But now I know one more thing... That I'm not only selfish and unreasonable"

"I guess you aren't. But I have changed, too" she said, feeling her violent rage building inside her heart. "I'm not the same one you knew. I changed" she ejected as if it were an insult to him to know she had changed.

"You're still the same person, Mai. Cold outside and caring inside." He almost smiled, despite himself, remembering Mai's advice over Azula's feelings, and the bouquet she had customized for his mother.

Mai clenched her fists. "Don't go around acting as you know me... as you _own_ me" she added slowly and scathingly.

Zuko tilted his head to gaze at her, almost preoccupied. "If you don't want me, please tell me. Should I go?"

Mai uncrossed her arms, her fists clenched over her lap. "All this time..." she muttered as if she hadn't heard him, " _all - this - time..._ I hated you". The firebender swallowed hard, feeling the hatred sink deep down, clinging and toying with his deepest scars. Mai's eyes gazed at him furtively and her lips spread to say again: "I hated you. I _hated_ you. I gave you all and you tossed me aside." Longly held back tears started to flood her eyes, and she hated herself for showing them.

Zuko felt unsure about what to do. Should he comfort her... or should he head outside and finish the conversation? He noticed that Mai's fists were still clenched... so hard, that her white hands looked almost reddish. He reached for her hands and tried to open them, but it didn't work. He tried to remember: what had he done when Azula had her angsty crying sessions? Oh, that was it: he reached forward and approached Mai's head to his chest. Her eyes flew open, but she didn't resist. Zuko made a space for Mai's head in the crook of his neck. The girl's tears fell over his shoulder. He didn't care if Mai hated him; he just didn't want to leave her alone at such a moment. She could be pointing at him with the hate of a thousand knives and he would still find a path between them to soothe her. That was Zuko, the Zuko she always knew and loved. She sighed slowly, letting the warmth of his embrace soothe her shattered tears as her violent sobs prolonged for a while.

Once it was over, Zuko reached for a napkin, damped it on a glass of water, and handed it to Mai. The girl cleaned up her face harshly. Suddenly she felt really tired, vulnerable, and small. Zuko placed a lonely kiss on her scalp, so imperceptible that she doubted it was real: her eyes went wide open again in shock and disbelief.

Zuko helped her to the bed and turned off the lights.

"We can never talk about this again," he said calmly, almost like a lull. "Try to rest"

He had started to depart when Mai's cold hand reached for his from the bed. He turned to look at her.

"I forgot something," she said as cooly as she could, staring into emptiness as if it were a mere fling.

Mai would never lose her pride.

"You can tell me tomorrow," he replied, knowingly teasing her.

"It's not a big deal. I just... don't hate you." She sat at the bed, searching for his eyes. When she met them, she recognized the secret shine from them... intimate, warm, almost undetectable.

He squeezed her hand and sat next to her.

"I don't hate you, either"

Zuko's face was so close that she could feel his tea-like fragrance like a mist. Trapped by the glare of his eyes, she couldn't separate from him. She had to get the upper hand -somehow, however. She squeezed his hand ruthlessly.

"Just kiss me already" she muttered, closing the distance between their lips.

The encounter was so unexpected, yet so longing and full of meaning, that Zuko had to open his eyes just to see if it was real after all. He was surprised to find Mai's eyes open, too. But he didn't pull apart. Instead, he just grabbed her face and descended into her jaw, showering it with kisses before inhaling the scent of her hair. "I missed you so much" he whispered on her ear, letting his voice linger over her skin. They were not kids anymore, and he was not going to deny his feelings to _her,_ the only one in the world who could see his vulnerability and might as true as they were. Mai melted into his mouth, his face still tangled between her hair. He reached out and pulled it out of his face with one hand, smelling the scent from the crook of her neck. The girl started to pant ever so slightly, feeling the grip of Zuko's hand against her scalp.

As he started to pull down the robe over her shoulders, Mai started to mutter his name. He wanted to hear it, he needed to hear it from her- just saying that she loved him. But he was not going to ask for it: he was going to work for it, slow and steady. Long ago, Mai was the one who always dominated their encounters, but now he didn't want her to carry on. He wanted to worship her, make it up for the sake of lost time and the pain of their separation. He tickled the sensitive skin from Mai's shoulders with his tongue, caressing the other side with his free hand. He was so gentle, so unbearably gentle that Mai almost couldn't bear it. Fiery and resolved as she was, she reached for Zuko's body, letting her hands fly between the folds of his silk robe, untying the sash, and tossing it aside in a calculated movement. He was so toned and his skin so soft that she almost grinned. She had him all to herself now.

It was then when Zuko finally uncovered her breasts, breaking his lips from her skin to gaze at them from afar. Mai resisted the urge to cover herself, feeling awkwardly exposed by the fact that he was, somehow, getting the upper hand. She stared directly at the darkness in Zuko's eyes with instinctive curiosity.

"You're beyond beautiful, Mai" he muttered breathlessly, fighting the urge to raven on her breasts like a wild animal. Instead, he picked up one of Mai's hands, kissing the palm and placing it over his chest to make her feel his rapid heartbeat and the agitation of his breath. Wordlessly, Mai leaned against his shoulder, kissing his neck from jaw to clavicle and enjoying the sound of Zuko's hoarse whispers. He softly placed his hand against one of Mai's breasts, raising her face with the other hand to kiss her. As she slowly started to rub herself against him, he approached his hand to her mouth, letting her lick him, getting turned on at the texture of her wet tongue against his skin. Using her own wetness, he petted at her nipple, licking the other one gently.

"Zu- Zuko" she mumbled gingerly, relenting against his touch: "Wait a minute".

"What is it?" he wondered, staring at her worriedly.

Mai stood up from the bed and approached the bedside table, reaching for her purse. "We need... this," she said, extracting a couple of condoms from the inside.

Zuko almost laughed. He was missing something very important, but here was Mai to help him, as always. They stared at each other knowingly: this was the consent sign. They wanted each other openly, and the knowledge made them feel wilder every second that passed. Mai placed a hand over Zuko's abs, grabbing his face with the other to kiss him, her hand cold and hard. He wrapped his arms against the small of her back, placing her over the bed gently and grabbing her waist in a strong grip.

"Tell me what you want" he nibbled raggedly against her neck.

Mai grabbed his hand eagerly and placed it over her pelvis. "Touch me" she commanded, throwing her head back and watching him through her eyelashes. Zuko conceded immediately: he slid his hand between Mai's thighs, separating the folds of sensitive skin and enjoying the dampness in the area. He introduced a finger inside her, surrendering to the feeling of glory that overwhelmed him from the touch: she was just as hot and tight as he remembered, yet everything was new. He kissed her as if time had passed in an imperceptible eternity, deep and slow, sliding one more finger against her and using her own moisture to rub at her clit. Zuko was getting so turned on that he started to pant against her neck, sucking at her earlobe gently. Slowly, she started to moan and whisper his name, sweet obscenities passing through her mind, rubbing and rocking against his hand until a small portion of fluid covered his fingers.

His member got so hard at the watery texture that ran between Mai's legs that he almost couldn't bear it: an idea crossed his mind, and he retired his hand from Mai's vagina abruptly and placing it negligently over her belly. A protest sound came from her lips, and she grabbed his arm, trying to cling to it desperately, but Zuko didn't move. Instead, he grabbed Mai's face with his free hand, staring into her eyes possessively.

"Tell me what you want" he ordered, delighting himself with the plea sounds of her throat. She tried to rock against his hand, finding his erection encircled in it, brushing it against her clit. A sweet moan parted her lips, and Zuko guided her own hand towards his penis. Instinctively, she rubbed it up and down. "You want me?" he asked sheepishly.

The girl finally could talk, speaking fiercely to hide the imploration of her voice. "Yes... and now do me a favor and penetrate me before I kick you out of here"

Zuko grabbed the condom and started to break the wrapper. "As you wish" he complied, placing the condom over his hard penis. Mai helped him to slide it down, grabbing the tip with her fingers. Once it was over, Zuko positioned himself gingerly between Mai's long legs, putting his member at the warm entrance. She writhed slightly at the contact, spreading her legs around him and tightening them around his waist imperatively. She tried to reach for his back to impulse him inside her; but Zuko took a hold of Mai's hands, placed them above her head, and thrust himself inside her for once and all, enjoying the emotional tremble of Mai's legs as he sank deep down into her. He rocked against her hips almost like swaying, mid to entrance, teasing her with his slow and steady movements. He didn't want to lose himself: he could spend the eternity like this, making it last, making it deep. So long he had dreaded to never have her again, that he cherished and relished in the certainty of the present. Everything around him was as dark as Mai's hair: everything smelled like her, the world was made of the same substance that constituted her entirety. He was losing himself in the parting of her lips as she moaned, the texture of her body around him, the bland whiteness of her arms against the firm grasp of his hands on her wrists. She was losing herself at the movement of his pelvis, closing her eyes and biting her lips, driving her hips against his desperately, begging for more. Zuko was standing far above her, his strong chest over her head, so she could see the waving of his torso. It was driving her crazy to see him like this, so tender and possessive, moving steadily between her legs. She moaned sharply.

Zuko slid his hands against her arms, setting her wrists free from his dominant hold. He grabbed her hair with one hand, caressing her lips with the other. Lustfully, Mai encompassed her tongue against his fingers again. He stared at her viciously before starting to stroke her nipple with his damp hand, and Mai gave a long, pleading sound. Zuko pounced at her lips, opening her mouth with the tip of his tongue, sucking her lower lip as if he couldn't get enough. He started to thrust deeper, letting Mai's legs encircle his waist, petting her scalp right where he was holding her hair possessively. She scratched his back like an angry cat, groaning softly and contentedly.

"Zuko..." she whispered, biting her lower lip and staying still: "Zuko, take me against the wall" she ordered fiercely, shoving him aside and sitting on the bed. Taking him by the hand, she guided him towards an empty space against the wall, letting him massage her breasts from behind until she couldn't wait anymore. Approaching her butt to his member, she rubbed against him demandingly, guiding his hand towards her pelvis again. Zuko understood the signal, and he placed his member against her entrance. He separated Mai's folds with his member and penetrated her painfully slow, until she thrust back against him for more, eliciting a deep groan from him. Driving himself against her, he started to eagerly push against her body, swaying his hips in circles and making her pant loudly with the friction of his hard erection against her walls.

"Tell me when you're close" he requested, taking hold of one of Mai's hands against the wall and rubbing her clit with the other. A squirt slid over Zuko's hand, making him feel hot and powerful. "Mai..." he called her loudly, knowing she was near the point of no return for the way her legs had started to tremble. A rush of clearness took possession of his mind as he harshly pushed Mai's G-point, abandoning himself against the back of her neck. He took courage and finally confessed in a hoarse whisper: "Mai, I love you". He knew he had done it unconsciously, but he didn't care. He kissed her neck adoringly.

Mai's walls encircled mercilessly against his member at his words, and she placed a hand over his head, tangling her slender fingers between his hair, drawing him closer to her. He kissed her there, making her whimper again: "Zuko... I'm so close... Don't you stop" she commanded, thrusting herself uncontrollably against him, moaning his name one more time. Zuko couldn't stop, he could never stop. At least until she came with him.

"Zuko, I- I'm coming" she advertised, squirming at his pelvis, her walls tightening senselessly around his member. She was so wild and hot that Zuko almost couldn't control himself: he ran a hand across her body, stroking Mai's smooth curves, clinging to her breast desperately for balance and holding to the damn world. The sound of her damp skin beating against his was setting him off himself.

As Mai finally lose control, she bent back against him, leaning her head against his shoulder. Her hips started to shake as she thoughtlessly murmured at his ear: "I love you, Zuko."

Encouraged by her words, Zuko drove himself against her fast and deep, one last time, letting her final contractions milk him. He forgot about everything and orgasmed inside Mai, letting the condom contain the result of a long-awaited and desired encounter. He retired himself from her body, hugging her strongly to protect her back from the cool air with his own body.

After a minute, he finally tossed the blessed condom aside.

"Let's go to bed" she requested, turning to him and surrounding his neck with her arms. Zuko picked her up like a bride and approached to bed, laying her gently over the pillows and rested his head over her long, jet-black locks, aspiring the scent of sex that emanated from her skin. They kissed each other lingeringly and longingly, staring at each others' eyes as if they couldn't get enough.

"Mai", he whispered, almost like a question.

"Hm?" The girl's eyes fluttered open on a weary blink.

"... Me too" he finally added, squeezing her against him adoringly.

"Ugh" was the short answer. He was so cheesy, but she hadn't lain. And he knew it, too.

Tangled in each other, they fell asleep soundly for the first time in so long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is a non-musical chapter, but if something gave me inspiration enough to write this -I hope- sexy lemon, was this song from Faith No More "The Real Thing" album from 1989. If you're into old-school metal (much lighter than nowadays) or even rock, this is a great song. And I think it's meaning is deep enough as to accompany the Maiko moment at the end.  
> So, for music's sake, let's make a welcome for the song on this chapter:  
> The Real Thing - Faith No More.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYFDKk4K1tY


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